Help make those tomorrows better

So many people and so many events can be written about relating to our LGBTQ+ sisters and brothers, but today ends Pride Month, and there are other things happening in our world too. Of course, if doesn't have to be June to talk about LGBTQ+ matters. Do feel free to add some names and stories in the comments section, because there really is a lot more to say.

Sadly, there is still a long way to go before everyone is treated with dignity and respect. There are those who are still trying to pass laws that take away basic human rights. We just saw the Supreme Court reverse Roe vs. Wade, and one Justice has even said landmark high court rulings that established gay rights and contraception rights should be reconsidered. How great if society treated all people equally and with true justice and respect. Sadly, that isn't the case.

I'm thrilled that there were celebrations, and I look for many more, but we also have to face the reality that people are still being bullied, beaten and even killed just for being their true selves. On this last day of Pride Month, do something special for yourself and also for an LGBTQ+ stranger. Help make those tomorrows better.

The other Harvey

It's hard to think of celebrations, following yesterday's Supreme Court decision, but we must move forward.  There still is much to celebrate and Harvey is one of those great reasons for celebrations!  You may assume I'm talking about Harvey Milk, we talked about him a week ago.  This time it's Harvey Fierstein.  You might remember him from a classic episode of Cheers, or from his roles in Mrs. Doubtfire, Independence Day, Garbo Talks, or The Year Without a Santa Claus, but for me he will always be Arnold Beckoff from Torch Song Trilogy and Edna Turnblad in Hairspray.

Fierstein is much more than a fine actor though.  He is also a wonderful voice actor, occasional columnist, and a playwright, and was one of the first openly gay celebrities in the country and put a face on the lgbtq community. 

His Torch Song Trilogy gives a portrait of gay life, for those who don't really have a clue.  He brought the performance to both the stage and to film and wasn't afraid to show two men in a loving committed relationship.  (Even though this blog is NOT about me, I should mention that the movie version of Torch Song is one of my all time favorites)!

By being visible, even if it might have held back his career, Harvey Fierstein has made a difference.  He continues to bring us joy and pride too with every single performance.

Admiral Levine

Last Friday, Compass LGBTQ Community Center in Lake Worth Beach, FL posted a very special message from our US assistant secretary for health. Let me introduce her to you. She is Rachel Leland Levine, MD, an American pediatrician and a four-star admiral in the United States Public Health Service Commissioned Corps. She served as Pennsylvania's Physician General and then later as Pennsylvania's Secretary of Health. President Joe Biden formally nominated her to be assistant secretary for health. She is the first openly transgender person to hold an office that requires Senate confirmation. Late last year she was commissioned as a four-star admiral in the US Public Health Service Commissioned Corps, becoming the first openly transgender four-star officer in any of the United States uniformed services. Admiral Levine is also the first female four-star admiral in the commissioned corps. Oh and the Admiral, as head of the US Public Health Service Commissioned Corps, is in charge of more than 6,000 public health professionals.

Let me go back to that special message I mentioned. You can hear what Admiral Levine had to say HERE. Also, if you'd like to know more about Compass LGBTQ+ Community Center, go to their website at https://www.compassglcc.com/

Someday I want to meet Admiral Levine in person. She seems like an incredible person. How wonderful it is to finally see a transwoman in such an important position. The other day I saw her holding a Pride Flag with White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, who is openly gay. Despite the bad news coming out of Washington, there are things to be happy about too! One more thing about Admiral Levine, she was named as one of USA Today's women of the year earlier this year, which recognizes women who have made a significant impact.

Statement on SCOTUS Ruling

The Supreme Court in a 6-3 decision today overturned Roe vs. Wade, the landmark ruling that established the constitutional right to abortion in the US back in 1973. You have probably already heard that. The court's ruling gives individual states the power to set their own abortion laws and almost half the states are expected to outlaw or severely restrict abortion as a result of the High Court's decision. Other states plan to maintain more liberal rules governing the termination of pregnancies. Only once in the fourteen years I have written this blog, have I made a second entry on any day (the other was when my mother died). This blog was never about me, but it is about all of us, and we need to get involved. We need to care.  My personal thoughts are below.

Today, the Supreme Court of the United States took us back 50 years. Women will die as a result of today's decision, and I find it disgusting that six Justices either don't care about that reality or don't understand it.

For American people to not care about each other, is shocking, but no surprise. Our country has been moving in that direction for a long time. I'm sad. For much of the country, this is Pride Weekend - a time to celebrate. I don't really feel much like celebrating.

I'm not giving up though. I still have hope. I hope for many this will be a wake-up call. We need to start caring about each other again. We need to get involved.

                                                                                                 -Michael

Mikey Bustos Day

Youtube introduced me to Mikey Bustos an I have been loving his videos for years. The Canadian singer, actor, comedian, antkeeper, farmer, and vlogger is not only entertaining, but also very informative. Three years ago when he told us he was in a relationship with his manager, RJ Garcia, many were surprised, but it was a happy announcement nonetheless.

On social media he wrote "For those of you who follow my original music, the songs might have a different context now. To help me cope, I wrote so many songs about being bisexual/gay/closeted in my two albums, e.g. If It Feels Good Then We Should, Secret Affair, Suspended, Every Time My Heart Beats."

I love watching his videos and all his other features, including his recent appearance on the Today Show.  You can find out a lot about Mikey at his official website at https://mikeybustosvideos.com/ including links to his various Youtube channels.

Oh and today is his birthday. Happy birthday Mikey and happy Pride to you and RJ!

Checking in on Kenneth

It was in 2020 that I first wrote about Kenneth W. Felts, calling him "proof that it is never too late." At the time Mr Felts was participating in the 2020 Denver Pride Virtual 5K, an event to benefit The Center on Colfax, an lgbtq+ organization in Denver, Colorado. He did it with a walker and while wearing a rainbow hoodie, and he raised quite a bit.

I gave an update on him here a year ago. We chatted a bit and he told me how free he feels. I suppose that is one of the benefits of coming out. He has also written a book, My Handful of Stars: Coming Out at Age 90, which tells the story of his life and of his coming out.  He also talks about the difficulty of acting non-gay in a dangerous and non-accepting world.

Oh and then there is his art!  I've only seen pictures, but I can say without any hesitation, that Mr Felts is quite talented.

The part of his story though that breaks my heart, is that he spent 90 years in the closet.  Oh my!  Many folks don't even live that long.  I cannot imagine going through life and not being my true and authentic self.  I am so happy that things changed a couple of years ago and that he can now live freely and with a partner whom he loves.

Some thoughts about our transgender sisters and brothers

As LGBTQ+ Pride month continues, there may be some who read this who are thinking that equality has been achieved and discrimination is no more.  Sadly, my friends, I must disagree.  While there have been great advances, the LGBTQ+ community is still one of the most discriminated against groups and that is especially true for the T (transgender).

 

Some of the negativity is a result of what I call unintentional stupidity.  Sometimes people say or do things without thinking or without really being aware.  This is the first group that really needs to be educated because a trans man is a man.  Period.  Nothing else needs to be said.  A trans woman is a woman.  Same thing.  End of discussion.  This is not rocket science folks.  Also, people are never referred to as it.  Use the names and pronouns that are appropriate to an individual's gender identity and if you are in doubt, ask.  Trans people are people - just like all people and deserve to be treated as such.

 

What's between your legs?  You certainly would not someone asking you that question, yet transgender people are asked that so often it amazes me.  It's none of your business.  Don’t make assumptions about a transgender person’s sexual orientation or whether they have had hormonal or surgical treatment or anything else of that personal a nature.  Think about it.  You don't ask private personal questions of people.  Some things you learn over time because you care about each other, but personal things come after trust and respect.

The mean-spirited and hateful legislation that has come out in the past year is disgusting.  So much of it is aimed at young people.  Show some respect.  Kids need our love and our support, not laws saying they can't play sports because of their gender identity.  That's ridiculous.

 

There is no way I can do a full and complete guide to interacting with transgender people.  Oh wait!  It's already been said.  People are people.  Throw out the discrimination.  Embrace equality.  Treat people as people.

LGBTQ Arts

 

We talked here these past few days about LGBTQ representation in music, film, and books.  What about the other arts though?  Well the theatre and ballet are known for having gay performers, but what about the subject matter.  Oh and how about magazines, radio, and of course television?

In brief, things are improving, but there is still a long way to go and there is still elements of transphobia, biphobia, and homophobia.  Magazines just might be the worst.  They seem to love outing celebrities, even ones who aren't ready to come out.

When That Certain Summer aired on ABC Television way back in 1972, it was the first television screenplay to sensitively explore homosexuality through the story of an American family split by divorce. Although just a tv movie with a single airing, That Certain Summer was groundbreaking.  I always remember Hal Holbrook and Martin Sheen for their sensitive portrayal of a gay couple.  It was a big deal then also for an actor to play a gay character.  Since then we've had series with leading gay roles like Will and Grace and Modern Family.

In 1961 San Francisco public television station KQED presented the first documentary on homosexuality to be seen on American television, The Rejected. (The last I checked, you can watch it on youtube).  There have been a lot of documentaries since then, many of them grossly inaccurate.

What do YOU think though?  What is missing?  What needs to be corrected?  Where are things especially good?  Will the LGBTQ community ever be treated fairly in the arts?

Harvey

At the top of the Grand Staircase in San Francisco's City Hall, in the Ceremonial Rotunda that is the most popular place in the building for weddings, you will find a bust of Harvey Bernard Milk.  If you don't know who Harvey Milk is, you really haven't been paying attention.  Something you might not realize though:  Milk only served on San Francisco's Board of Supervisors for just under eleven months.

His legacy is enormous, even if his actual contributions were few in number.  He was a first and even more important, he was a likable guy who could unite people for the common good.  His speeches, especially his "Hope" speech, are legendary.  I have quoted it here on more than one occasion.  There are building and schools and all kinds of things named for him.  Many of you reading this might not have even been alive when Milk was fatally shot (it was nearly 44 years ago), but his encouragement still lives, and it just might have influenced you.

There are some very specific things we should remember Milk for. He organized a pro-gay business association. He also helped start the Castro Street Fair, which continues to be popular. Oh, and locals will recall his most famous piece of legislation, which dealt with dog poop. The ordinance requires people to clean up after their dogs or face a fine.

LGBTQ Pride Month always brings many references to Harvey Milk of course.  I've already mentioned him here in this blog.  This morning I also want to quote him.  It's not as well-known as some of the things he said, it to me it sure is powerful.

"I cannot prevent anyone from getting angry, or mad, or frustrated. I can only hope that they'll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects I hope that every professional gay will say 'enough', come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help."

Remembering Pulse

Crimes against the LGBTQ community are all too frequent, and one of the more horrible occurred on this date in 2016. In what has been described as a hate crime and an act of terrorism, a lone gunman shot and killed 49 people and wounded another 53, at a gay nightclub called Pulse, in Orlando, FL.

I've written about it here and much has been written elsewhere. There isn't complete agreement as to why the gunman shot these people. What matters though is that lives were lost. It was Latin Night at Pulse, so many of the victims were of Latin heritage and most were gay.

During LGBTQ Pride month we celebrate with parties and parades and street fairs, but we must also remember. What has our past been?  Why did Pride begin? Why must we hold Pride events every year? How many times do member of the LGBTQ community get killed, and how many people care?  Here is an example of a horrible moment in our history that we must never forget. One more time please, say their names -   

Stanley Almodovar III, 23

Amanda Alvear, 25

Oscar A. Aracena-Montero, 26

Rodolfo Ayala-Ayala, 33

Alejandro Barrios Martinez, 21

Martin Benitez Torres, 33

Antonio D. Brown, 30

Darryl R. Burt II, 29

Jonathan A. Camuy Vega, 24

Angel L. Candelario-Padro, 28

Simon A. Carrillo Fernandez, 31

Juan Chevez-Martinez, 25

Luis D. Conde, 39

Cory J. Connell, 21

Tevin E. Crosby, 25

Franky J. Dejesus Velazquez, 50

Deonka D. Drayton, 32

Mercedez M. Flores, 26

Peter O. Gonzalez-Cruz, 22

Juan R. Guerrero, 22

Paul T. Henry, 41

Frank Hernandez, 27

Miguel A. Honorato, 30

Javier Jorge-Reyes, 40

Jason B. Josaphat, 19

Eddie J. Justice, 30

Anthony L. Laureano Disla, 25

Christopher A. Leinonen, 32

Brenda L. Marquez McCool, 49

Jean C. Mendez Perez, 35

Akyra Monet Murray, 18

Kimberly Morris, 37

Jean C. Nieves Rodriguez, 27

Luis O. Ocasio-Capo, 20

Geraldo A. Ortiz-Jimenez, 25

Eric Ivan Ortiz-Rivera, 36

Joel Rayon Paniagua, 32

Enrique L. Rios Jr., 25

Juan P. Rivera Velazquez, 37

Yilmary Rodriguez Solivan, 24

Christopher J. Sanfeliz, 24

Xavier Emmanuel Serrano Rosado, 35

Gilberto Ramon Silva Menendez, 25

Edward Sotomayor Jr., 34

Shane E. Tomlinson, 33

Leroy Valentin Fernandez, 25

Luis S. Vielma, 22

Luis Daniel Wilson-Leon, 37

Jerald A. Wright, 31

Don't Hide

Following his coming out on The Rachel Maddow Show on cable tv in March 2009, Dan Choi's world changed forever.  Dan is the son of a Korean-American Baptist minister and grew up in a pretty conservative part of Southern California. He graduated from West Point Academy in 2003 with a degree in Arabic and then served as an infantry officer in Iraq.  In June 2008, he transferred from active duty Army to the New York Army National Guard.

Dan's military record was spotless, but the Don't Ask/Don't Tell policy at the time meant he could not service in the military as an openly gay man, so after telling Rachel Maddow (and the world) that he is gay, his service was about to come to an end.  Sure enough, the discharge papers arrived in the mail.

Did Dan just quietly go home?  I should say not.  He became the poster boy for a change in military policy and led rallies and protests, made public appearances, held fundraisers, was part of several Pride Parades, and even chained himself to the White House fence. 

It wasn't just one issue for Dan.  He also worked for marriage equality, voiced public support for Chelsea Manning, and even ran for the San Francisco City College Board of Trustees.  The Don't Hide shirts he frequently wore, were created by his sister and spoke to being who you are without having to hide anything.  What an appropriate message as Pride Month comes to a close.  Everyone should be able to be their true self.

Dan Choi has been less active in recent years, spending more time in performing arts, but one thing is certain.  Dan inspired many along the way and indeed made a difference. 

Even small towns have gay people

Making a difference doesn't mean you have to be highly visible or become famous.  After living most of my life in large cities, I now live in a relatively small town where grassroots organizing can be really important.  All this month I am writing about lgbtq+ related topics and the various Pride events.  Many of them are in large cities, but there is an lgbtq+ presence in small towns as well.

In large cities, it's easier to meet other lgbt folks than in small towns.  Networking is important though, so a lesbian couple here began an internet presence which they administer and where dozens have now connected to share common interests and talk about lgbt issues.  That is a huge thing for folks who may feel isolated.  Growing up gay and thinking you are all alone can be difficult, but feeling alone can be just as hard when you are an adult.  (This by the way is something folks can do pretty much anywhere using facebook or twitter or various other platforms.  Once you start a group, invite those you know, and suggest that each of them send out invitations as well.  You'd be surprised how easy this can be).  Now the couple who began this group, didn't leave it just as an online resource.  They have arranged potluck suppers, a holiday party, and even a picnic in the park.  They also share lgbt news with the group and urge the others to do the same.

Two other woman did something else remarkable - they put together the very first Pride event here back in 2019, and had intended to continue it as an annual event.  They did this with no experience.  They saw a need and they filled it.  This is something we can all do in our own ways.  Of course the pandemic hit and some things needed to be changed, but that has been true everywhere.

The gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender residents in my area may have felt all alone in the past, but now there is a connection thanks to some people who cared - people who made a difference.  How are things where you live?

A month of Pride

June is filled with Pride Celebrations, especially in larger cities. There is a focus on our LGBTQ+ sisters and brothers and it seems everything is seen through a rainbow lens, even if only for this one month. There is a certain joy that show up every year at this time, but what's it all mean?

Are you proud? What are you proud of? I don't always understand the use of the word "pride" in this place. When we said freedom it made more sense to me, but pride, that one doesn't quite sound the same. (Gay Freedom Day was a name many places originally used for this event). What do you think? I tend to think of pride more in accomplishments, but being gay is just part of who I am. I'm certainly not proud of my blue eyes. Yes, they are nice, but Mom and Dad had much more to do with it than me and I pretty much think that's the case with my sexual orientation too. But this of course is NOT about me so, what do you think?

How about the celebrations - do we need so many? Do we still need any at all? As Pride Month begins, I'd really be interested in your thoughts. As the month rolls on, I'll be posting some stories of our past, some of our heroes, and a look forward to our future. Hopefully there will be a day ahead with no more prejudice and no more hate. Hopefully.

Pride Month

By proclamation yesterday President Joe Biden said "This month, we honor the resilience of LGBTQI+ people, who are fighting to live authentically and freely. We reaffirm our belief that LGBTQI+ rights are human rights. And we recommit to delivering protections, safety, and equality to LGBTQI+ families so that everyone can realize the full promise of America."

The Presidential Proclamation also said, "I call upon the people of the United States to recognize the achievements of the LGBTQI+ community, to celebrate the great diversity of the American people, and to wave their flags of pride high."

The entire text is on The White House website, for those of you interested in reading it all. You can see it HERE. White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre is likely to mention Pride at various times during the month in her press briefings. Jean-Pierre is the first openly gay person to ever hold that position.

So happy Pride everyone! Isn't it great to have a supportive President?