last request

Do you ever read the obituaries in the newspaper? Sometimes they can be humorous and sometimes they simply gave details of someone's life. Lately though I have come across several that are very inspiring, not just because of the life that had been led, but because of a last request.  There was a wonderful obituary a newspaper last week that brought me to tears.  A brother wrote some very touching words about his sister who had lived with cerebral palsy.  "I wish I could have made you laugh one more time," he wrote.

Frequently in obituaries there will be a "in lieu of flowers" statement, that directs folks to a charity that is significant to the deceased.  I also have seen some very nice "last requests."  In telling of one man who had recently passed away, the obituary said that one of his last wishes was for any person reading the obituary to perform a good deed in his honor for someone that they may have had friction with or disliked. Wow! Someone wanted to continue the love even after they were gone. How wonderful. How many people did a good deed in his honor? There is of course no way to know, but what a wonderful idea!

Maybe this will inspire folks reading this to make other last requests. What would you want your legacy to be? How would you like to be an inspiration to strangers, even after you are gone?  Of course, estate planning is another way to help those who come after you while also keeping your name alive.

let's choose

Some things are more difficult to speak about than others. Some of us are in positions where we don't have to say anything at all. There are those though who always do the right thing - those who stand up and speak out and make a difference. We can choose to be one of those people. We can choose to be like Jason Chu.

Remarkable just doesn't get to what I want to say. I can't think of any word that does. I have mentioned Jason Chu here a couple of times before and I have found myself listening to his words over and over. Remarkable though. He speaks truth.

He doesn't just speak.  He performs.  He's an artist.  You really should watch his YouTube videos.  Subscribe HERE.  In one video, he talks about Freddie Gray and about Baltimore and about privilege.  In that one, THEY WON'T SHOOT ME (I am not #FreddieGray), Jason says what we all should be saying - if indeed we speak. 

Perhaps the most profound thing Jason says this time, is at the very end "Privilege means I get to choose.  So, I choose."  Let's all make that choice!

Still blogging after all these years

Every morning, after a shower and brisk walk (or sometimes run), I sit down and blog about kindness.  My words are ones that I usually formulate during my walk.  Sometimes I think of things to say for the next several days, which helps when I have those occasional days where my mind seems to go blank.  Next, I write this blog - it's NOT about me.  It is about all of us and how we can make a difference in this world.  I hope you enjoy reading these words, as much as I enjoy writing them.

I have written about my personal heroes and people and organizations I greatly admire.  Toan Lam is one of those folks I will never tire of writing about.  Colin Kaepernick too.  I love telling about neighborhood people who do good deeds.  I love retelling the stories of folks like Harvey Milk, Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa and so many others.  I can go on and on too about Katharine Jefferts Schori, Dan Choi, Stuart Gafney, David Chiu, Zoe Dunning, and on and on. 

 

It has been my great honor also to share the story of Lillian Weber who made a huge impact on so many people when she sewed an amazing 1,234 dresses for the organization Little Dresses for Africa, working on past her 100th birthday. The story of Dan McKernan and Barn Sanctuary which he created and runs, is another tale I am so happy to tell.  I remember writing here about the Hat Lady and of course several entries about the wonderful Arnel Pineda.

 

When I began this back in 2008, I had no idea I would be doing this for so long.  There are a lot more things to say though and so, I shall continue.  I hope you will continue to read, and I hope you will also share any comments and suggestions here from time to time.  Without you, there really would be no point in doing this!

Read any good books lately?

Have you read any good books lately? Seriously. That might sound like an odd question here, but books can be powerful tools! It might be a book you read that will inspire you to change the world. If you don't read much, you should try it. You will find amazing things!

I book can bring you a lot of information too. If you love cooking or building or designing or any number of hobbies, books can be of great help. They can show you how to do things and even give you ideas of things you might never have thought of.

How about a nice adventure story or trashy romance novel or a suspenseful murder mystery? The fiction on your bookshelves can transport you to just about anywhere. Want to learn a new hobby or explore history? There are all kinds of non-fiction options. Having a tense day? Perhaps a book of poetry can help soothe things. How about a volume of jokes and riddles? Maybe what you need is just a nice coffee table book filled with great photographs.

If your home is without much of a literary selection, surely there is a library not too far away. If you're lucky, there might even be a nice little bookstore with selections that not only might bring you joy, some titles you might bring home for others too. After all, the joy of books is good to share. Books make good presents too!

Missing a piece of the puzzle

Somehow I never really got into the jigsaw puzzle thing. Mom loved them and I remember her having them laid out on a card table when I was little. It might take her a while because she stopped to do other things, but when she found those last pieces, it was an accomplishment - especially that last missing piece of the puzzle.

 

Sometimes our lives are like that. It doesn't mean we are unhappy necessarily, but we are looking for something that just is not there. When it comes: WOW! It seems somewhat like finding those missing puzzle pieces. (Now of course if you are putting together a jigsaw puzzle, you actually look for those pieces. In life we might not even realize that something is even missing).

 

So what do we do? Well, keeping our minds and our hearts open to new possibilities is always a good thing. Listening to others and realizing that "our" way might not be the "only" way is a start in the right direction. If we think there is a missing piece that we'd like to find, there is nothing wrong with asking for help too. Perhaps our puzzle pieces are a bit more fluid than those of the jigsaw puzzle. Perhaps in some cases, there is nothing really missing at all.

Pranks a lot

Be careful. Seriously, be careful today. Is it real, or is it an April Fool's joke? Some people believe every single thing they read. Today might be the exception. April 1st is probably the only day of the year when people critically evaluate everything they read online, before accepting it as fact. Perhaps we should do that every day.

Jokes and pranks can be fun, if they are done in that spirit, but all too often they are just plain mean. There certainly is no humor in being unkind. I used to be a big fan of All Fool's Day. There have been some wonderful ones (one of my favorites was the Taco Liberty Bell back in the late 90s). There have also been ones that have caused great grief. Then, I am not a fan.

I write about positive uplifting things here, and laughter is wonderful medicine, but sadness and misery are not good things, and so when it comes to this day I really have mixed feelings. Be good. Have fun. Don't make anyone feel bad in the process. Maybe my first two words are a good way to go today: Be careful.

taking on the bullies

How many lives have been cut short due to bullying?  We don't need to know a number, because ANY life lost is too many!  Bullying should have no place in our schools or in our churches or in the lives of our kids.  We need to take on the bullies and put an end to their evil.

 

Bullying must end.  We need to stand up and speak out.  We don't always see it, but bullying is very widespread.  The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that in 2011, 20% of students in grades 9–12 experienced bullying.  Don't be surprised if you never heard anything from your own children.  Bullying often goes unreported.

 

Speak out means we need to convince our kids that it is important for them to report these things to us.  As adults, we need to tackle bullying head-on and let the bullies know that such behavior is not tolerated.  We need to stand up to the bullies.  We cannot tolerate such behavior, and we cannot sit silent when our children are taking their own lives when they cannot bear the bullying any longer.

We must create a world in which teenagers, especially lgbtq teens, are celebrated and accepted for who they are. We all need to become more involved, and we need to speak up!