Give today

Today is Giving Tuesday. It happens each year on the Tuesday right after Thanksgiving, which is today. Many organizations rely on this day for a huge chunk of their income, so we're talking big time giving here folks. I know that money doesn't grow on trees, but there are so many worthy charities out their that can use a hand, and I hope that some of you can oblige.

We have a wonderful sense of gratitude each year on Thanksgiving Day and then we turn to corporate greed on Black Friday and Cyber Monday. Supposedly we are buying gifts for others, but how many of us really are and how many of us are spending money we cannot even afford? Besides money though, we can give of our time and we can share the information with others.

 

You would be amazed how much good you can do!  It doesn't have to be huge amounts either because your donations are added to those of others and together the collection can be quite impressive.  Not sure who is most deserving?  Check out the Giving Tuesday website at https://www.givingtuesday.org/ and see the many ways you can get involved.

 

Don't think you cannot afford to participate.  Giving Tuesday is not for rich people, it is for all people.  As I said, there are a lot of ways to participate and donating money does not have to mean donating large sums.  The important thing is involvement.  Join me, won't you?

How many

Hearing this same question several times in reference to the lgbtq community, I just HAVE to say something. In reference to same sex marriage, I heard it asked "Why should we be concerned about such a small group of the population?" This month I have heard two different people saw the same thing about our transgender sisters and brothers. Just yesterday, I heard someone on television ask why bathroom accommodations should be made when there are so few people involved. I can recall back in the early days of AIDS there was concern about the blood supply, and it was said that too few people were involved to make testing of the blood worthwhile.

How many does it take? When will we stop discriminating. Justification of our various prejudices has often been linked to numbers. If a race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion or any other group is in the minority, some folks think that is reason to discriminate. What about abused animals?  Are tons of dogs, cats, horses, or other animals mistreated in your community? It isn't the number that we should be concerned about, because any abuse, yes ANY, is too much.   "Not many of them, so they don't count."

WRONG!

Everyone counts. Everyone is important. I'm sorry if I seem to keep getting up on my soapbox, but I have to say this. In fact, I want to scream it from the rooftops! All lives matter. Everyone should be able to live a full and rich life without fear or intimidation. Everyone. It doesn't matter how many. Now let me be clear. I'm not saying that any action is okay. We aren't talking about what folks do, but rather who folks are. Discrimination based on identity is wrong.

let's make some good news

There has just been too much bad news lately. I'm tired of seeing so much hate. I am very tired of seeing innocent people dying. I am saddened by the recent celebrity deaths. There seems to be nothing but bad news. But, it doesn't have to be that way!

 

First a couple of things:  there ARE good things happening in this world, we just aren't hearing enough about them.  For some reason, the mainstream media tends to pay more attention to the negative stories than the positive ones.  We need to speak up and let them know we want ALL the news, especially those good stories.  Secondly, when we see bad things happening, let's all work a little harder to turn things around and get a more positive outcome.

 

Now I am not so naïve as to think that everything can be turned around overnight, but if we don't try, we might never know how much good we can do.  Of course we cannot put an end to the deaths of famous people.  Death is part of life.  We can work toward a world without suicide though.  We can have better resources available so nobody every has to think that is the only alternative.

 

There might not ever be a day when every single story in the newspaper is upbeat and positive, but I sure as heck want to work toward that day.  Don't you?

Rejoice!

The word "rejoice" means to show or feel that you are very happy about something. The time between Thanksgiving and Christmas is traditionally the happiest time of the year. Church-goers might recognize the Scripture verses from yesterday that contain the word "rejoice." Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice (Philippians 4:4) and Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5:16).  The common greeting in the malls and restaurants we frequent even urges happiness.

When I see people sleeping on the sidewalk because they have no place to call home, it's hard to rejoice.  When I see people being shot by the police because of their race, it's very hard to rejoice.  When children are taking their own lives because they are bullied and left to feel worthless and unloved, I find it very difficult to be happy.  When students carry guns on to school campuses and open fire on their fellow students, how can I even think of rejoicing?

We each have free will and we each have an opportunity, I think even a responsibility, to get involved and to do good things.  That's the whole theme of this daily blog.  Each one of us can make a difference.  Is the world perfect?  Of course not!  It's so easy sometimes to see all the gloom and doom that it easy to throw our hand in the air and give up, but change doesn't happen that way.  Sometimes making things better requires a little work.  Amid all the bad there is always some good too.  In that good, we should rejoice, as we build on it to make more good.

Ask yourself this question: Do you consistently look for reasons to rejoice, even when your own circumstances or events in the world make it difficult to endure?  Perhaps that could be a starting point.  Look for the good and work to create more good, and then .   .   . rejoice!

Sadness at a time of joy

Thanksgiving weekend is a time of joy for most Americans. Normally we gather together with family and friends and enjoy wonderful feasts while watching football and parades and preparing for a month of holiday parties. Hopefully we spend some of the day doing what the day was actually set aside for - giving thanks. There have been times though when this joyful holiday is also a day of sadness. 

Those of you old enough will recall that President John F Kennedy was shot and killed just five days before Thanksgiving back in 1963. The new President, Lyndon Johnson announced on Thanksgiving morning that Cape Canaveral, in Florida "shall be known hereafter as Cape Kennedy." (The old name was restored less than ten years later).

Already suffering great sadness for the 918 souls lost in the Jonestown, Guyana massacre, San Francisco was hit by another tragedy back in 1978 - the murder in City Hall of two elected officials. 

Today marks the anniversary of those assassinations of San Francisco Mayor George Moscone and Supervisor Harvey Milk. People waking up on this date in 1978 saw a headline in the San Francisco Chronicle that read MOSCONE, MILK SLAIN--DAN WHITE IS HELD. Less than a month before Christmas, with San Francisco decorated in its holiday splendor, there was great sadness at a time of joy. 

Lately there has been a lot of negative news, including the shooting of two National Guardsmen yesterday and a horrible fire in Hong Kong where at least 75 people perished and many are still missing.  Our country seems more divided than I have ever seen it.  Still, on this Thanksgiving Day, even in the midst of so much sadness, there are still reasons to be thankful.

Never give up, I always say.  We can make things better.  We can create more and more reasons to give thanks!

'Twas the Night Before Thanksgiving

Just about everyone is familiar with Clement Clarke Moore's classic poem 'Twas the Night Before Christmas, and in a month, I'll be happy to share it here, but NOT NOW. I don't know when we got in such a hurry, but it isn't anything new. Each year though we seem to outdo each other by being earlier and earlier. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day, and I'd like to concentrate on that for now.

Now don't get me wrong. I love Christmas! I always have and probably always will. When I was little, I was scared because of a horrible news story and Mom said to think of something happy. I thought of Christmas. Christmas makes me happy. This isn't Christmastime though. It certainly wasn't Christmastime when I saw those first decorations going up a couple of months ago!

I'm very traditional, and there might not be many more folks who think this way. In a month I will begin my Christmas festivities and they will continue until January 6th. For me, the twelve days of Christmas is the way to celebrate, but I may very well be alone in that thinking.

We do have a very fine holiday coming up tomorrow. I can begin tonight with this wonderful children's book featuring Farmer Mack Nuggett and his turkey farm. This is a delightful tale that this grown man pulls out each year, even though I am told that Dav Pilkey created it for little kids.  I guess there is a bit of kid in all of us!

Amendment of life

I have written here that we need to stop telling the untrue story about Thanksgiving and finally admit to the horrible deeds of our ancestors. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. I like the idea of gathering with family and friends. I enjoy the traditional food. I like the whole idea of giving thanks. I can easily separate all of that from those "first Thanksgiving" stories, because I don't think that is why we gather today. I always think it is important to mend our errors though.

Yes, I didn't do those horrible things, and neither did you, but it was done on our land and in the name of this country. We need to admit it. We also need to move forward and vow to never do anything like that. Let's also look at the good things we have done and the good that have happened in our lives. Our ancestors committed horrors, but they certainly did some positive things as well. We might personally have never done anything that can be described as horrible, but we can still apologize on their behalf. Then, we need to move on.

"Thanksgiving Day has baggage to be sure - in fact, with the atrocities committed, baggage is an understatement. I'm not suggesting we should ignore it either. Perhaps we need to re-invent the day. My suggestion though is that we continue to give thanks; that we continue to gather together. Let us do so honestly though, making reparations for our past, and looking ahead with thankful hearts for all the good that we can be." Those were my words here last year, and I still believe this.

Being thankful

For what, if anything, are you thankful? As we prepare for the Thanksgiving holiday, some folks make lists of the good things in their lives that they are grateful for. Others ask, "What's to be thankful for"? There is of course always a reason to be thankful.  Lots of reasons!

Wonderful Oprah Winfrey once said "Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough."  Excellent advice of course.

Sometimes it can be really helpful to just take stock of all the good in our lives.  As we end this eleventh month of the year, take a moment and think about all the positive things - even small ones.  Think too of the people in your life who make a difference.  Think of your accomplishments and all that you hold dear.  Be thankful.

The Good and the Bad

It seems like every day I wake up to a mixture of good and bad news. There seems to be more and more of the bad news.

Although Israel signed a ceasefire one year ago to end hostilities in Lebanon, today began with the Israeli military attacking the southern suburbs of Beirut. Casualties have been reported.

As we prepare for the celebration of Thanksgiving Day in the United States, we also just remembered the murder-suicide of Johnstown back in 1978, the loss of so many transgender souls do to hate, the murder of President John Kennedy, and we are approaching the anniversary of the assassination of two San Francisco politicians. That is only part of it.

I won't dwell on the bad or even mention the good. I just want to remind everyone of what I so often say here. WE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. So no to hate. Spread kindness and positivity. Do good. Say no to things that harm others. I'm going to keep trying to convince people that there are so many reasons to be nice to one another.

As Thanksgiving week begins, I have so much to be thankful for, and I hope you do too. Let's make that list grow. Let is fill our lives with good and work hard to eliminate the bad.  I know we can make things better.

That Day In Dallas

Those of you who are older than me, probably remember in great detail that day in Dallas. Dr Martin Luther King had given his “I Have A Dream” speech three months earlier.  Zip codes (“Zone Improvement Plan”) and touch-tone phones were pretty new.  Everyone was listening to The Beatles (or making fun of them).  We were still six months away from the first moon landing.  None of that really stands out for me in relation to November 22, 1963, but I remember the news from that day and from the days that followed.

My grandparents lived just two blocks from my elementary school, so it was there that I went when school closed early that day and they sent us home.  It was there where I spent much of the next few days too.  I remember watching the state funeral on television.  I remember all the talk about this John F Kennedy, that I didn't really know about - I was a kid.  They kept showing the events over and over though and so it is burned into my memory.  That day in Dallas is something I will never forget.

Over the years there have been other such events. Some of them have been good (like the first walk on the moon) and many have been bad (like so many other assassinations). It would be nice to think that only good things would come and that we would learn from the bad and that going forward, we wouldn't make the same mistakes. Sadly, that hasn't been the case.

Can we learn?  Can we find a way to love?  Can we stop the hate and the destruction?  What do YOU think?

What sayeth you?

It seems like everyone is making a speech these days, but are they saying anything?  Will you be able to quote anyone in a year's time, or even in a month?

A great President long ago spoke these words: "Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal." Who will forget these words of Abraham Lincoln?

From John F Kennedy: "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." He also said "A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on."

From the wonderful Maya Angelou, who always inspired me: "Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud." What an incredible woman she was! One of my favorite quotes from her is "My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style."

The great inventor Thomas A. Edison said "If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves." Sounds good to me! Let's listen to him and to the many voices that have encouraged us, and let's astound ourselves!

Transgender Day of Remembrance

Today is Transgender Day of Remembrance, begun in 1999 to memorialize the murder of transgender woman Rita Hester in Allston, Massachusetts.  It has spread around the world with some places giving a more official recognition.  In Ontario, Canada the province unanimously passed the Trans Day of Remembrance Act in 2017, and the Legislative Assembly there is now required to hold a moment of silence every year on November 20.

So what else happens on this day? Typically, there is a reading of the names of those who lost their lives from November 20 of the former year to November 20 of the current year. Sometimes there are speakers, marches, and candlelight vigils. Newspapers will often devote a separate section today as well.

This is a sad occasion though - make no mistake about it.  Transphobic violence is a frightening occurrence that spreads fear to the transgender community and to their families and friends.  That violence so often leads to death.  Nobody should have to live in fear, yet many transgender people are even afraid to use public restrooms.  This needs to change, not only here in the United States, but around the world.  Trans violence is a hate crime that, when it occurs, needs to be fully prosecuted.

Transgender Day of Remembrance is an observance that I would like to see disappear, because the murder of our trans sisters and brothers needs to stop.  We can do it.  Take a stand against hate.  Don't let it continue.

Live for something greater

Just what does it mean to live for something greater?  Think about it for a moment.  Are we talking about great accomplishments?  Are we talking about a greater power?  Are we talking about a set of values?  What do you think?

 

I write a lot about hometown heroes and to me, those are the folks who live for something greater.  It might not have been something they thought about or planned, but by their actions or by their words, they made a difference and it was something that endures.

 

Do you want you live to be infancy, school, work, retirement, and then death with no great milestones along the way?  Well most of us don't.  It's human nature to do new things and along the way to become more and more popular and to have more and more friends.  Although we know we cannot live forever, many of us want something we do or say to last beyond our time on this earth.  That's what motivates them to do great things.

 

The motivations can be many.  There need not be just one answer to my above questions.  How about if we all strive to live for something greater!

The Tragedy of Jonestown

It is with great sadness for the 918 souls lost at The Peoples Temple Agricultural Project, better known by its informal name "Jonestown," that I always think back on this date. Most of those who died by forced suicide that day were originally from the San Francisco area, where I lived. The news was hard to take wherever you lived, but particularly difficult in the Bay Area.

Nearly half of Jonestown residents were black women and 304 residents were minors.  What kind of lives might they have lived?  What kinds of things would they be doing now in 2025?

I always think of former Representative Jackie Speier at this time of year too.  She spent a lifetime of public service and was with Representative Leo Ryan when they went to investigate Jonestown.  Speir survived five gunshot wounds while Ryan was assassinated.  He had been shot more than twenty times.  I think also of NBC News correspondent Don Harris and NBC News cameraman Bob Brown who were shot at the same time as Ryan.

How many of you remember that day?  How many of you were born since then?  How might those 900+ people have interacted with you over these past years.  How much, if anything, have we learned since then about cults and about blind faith in those who might do us harm.  Could another tragedy like this happen again?  What do YOU think?

I can almost smell the turkey!

November is the favorite month of the year for many, and Thanksgiving Day is a big reason why. Since I was just a kid I have always loved Thanksgiving and while I know it is still a couple weeks away, I can almost smell the turkey now! Even though we still have a few weeks to go, I thought I'd take a moment to talk about what it all means.

First of all, as much as I love turkey, I really don't like the nickname "Turkey Day." Thanksgiving is so much more of course. (Not to mention that not everyone eats turkey, although I don't know why). As much fun as the football games are, and the huge feast, and the preparations for Christmas, the big thing is coming together and giving thanks. Some other countries do similar observances, but only Canada does pretty much the same customs as in the US, except that theirs is a bit earlier, in October.  The holiday has traditionally been a celebration of the blessings of the (agricultural) year, including the harvest. More recently a lot of folks have included all blessings that have come their way during the year (and some folks, during their lifetime).  Families generally gather to celebrate and often in larger number than at any other time during the year.  This year because of the pandemic there will be less travel and perhaps a lot of zoom Thanksgivings.

 

So giving thanks and being together with family and friends is what it's all about.  Now of course we didn't have to wait until today.  Being thankful all the time would be great.  2020 has been a crazy year, but there have been good things along the way.  If you are reading this, one good thing is that you are still around.  Let's always be thankful, not on just one day!

One person can make a difference

Seventeen years ago, when I wrote my very first entry here, I spoke of changing the world; of giving back to society; of making a difference.  The theme of this blog has remained the same throughout and I trace it all back to my childhood when John F Kennedy was the US President.  Kennedy challenged us to dream.  He challenged us to make a difference.

It has been more than fifty years since his words were spoken, but they carry the same encouragement now, as then. On January 20, 1961 at his inauguration at the US Capital, Kennedy said the line most often quoted: "Ask not what your country can do for you—ask what you can do for your country." The President was challenging every single American to contribute in some way to the public good - to make a difference. We still can answer that call!

I don't remember if it was Jacqueline Kennedy or John Kennedy who said this (it has been attributed to both, although Caroline Kennedy credits her father with the words in her forward to the anniversary edition of Profiles In Courage). "One person can make a difference and everyone should try." Indeed. Everyone.

 

I know this blog is NOT about me, and I don't know of my success here, but every day, through my blogs and activism, I want to do something that benefits someone else.  I hope you will join me.

To do good and to distribute

From the book Hebrews in The Bible:  "To do good and to distribute, forget not: for with such sacrifices God is well pleased." What exactly does that mean?  Well, the message is for us to not forget to do good and to share what we have because God is pleased with these kinds of sacrifices.  Actually the word "sacrifices" might not even be the best translation.  We might better say that God is pleased with those kinds of offerings.

 

Doing good and sharing - such a simple thing, huh? This pleases God and let me tell you it pleases a lot of others too. What though should we share?  How should we do good?  Of course there is not just one answer and it will likely be different for every one of us.  That's what makes it so wonderful. 

I have a coworker who brings fruit every day and she always offers me some.  It's part of who she is.  I have something and I will offer part of it to others.  It's like when you go to someone's house and they offer you a beverage or perhaps even a snack. You came to see them - nothing more, but in their charity and in their hospitality, they offer to share more than just themselves.

 

Think about this today. What does doing good mean in your life? How do you share what you have? (One really helpful kind of sharing is if you give us some feedback in the comments section below).

Baby it's cold outside

Although winter doesn't officially come to the US until next month, the temperatures have already dipped in a number of places. Here in Arizona where I live, it's been down in the 30s every night this week, and we even had a significant snowfall already. Now is a good time to remember your farm animals or pets and to especially remember the homeless who are outside all the time.

Nice clean warm socks, sturdy shoes, and warm blankets to cover yourself, and of course a good sturdy overcoat are all so very helpful to those in need. A Texas organization called Project Warm Us can use donations and volunteers. Find out more at http://www.projectwarm.us/ A Nashville based organization called Soles4Souls distributes shoes to needy people and, I'm told is also now distributing coats. Their website is https://soles4souls.org/ There are churches and other organizations in communities across the country that do collections and give these things to the needy. Check around where you live, and if you don't find anything, consider beginning a program of your own. The thanks you get back will warm your hearts!

When I lived in San Francisco, we had an annual memorial for people who died outside on the street. Many of those died because of the cold. Most of those deaths could have been prevented. Let's step up and do something.

one little word

Really want to make a difference?  Make sure this word is part of your vocabulary:  thanks.  It's pretty simple - when someone does something for you, however big or small, say thanks!  When people say it to me, it really makes my day.

 

During the course of the week I do various volunteer efforts and I really enjoy giving of my time and hopefully helping the life of other people.  I don't have any great expectations of something coming my way as a result of what I do, but you know what?  I get something often - a thank you!

 

Wow!  It's really hard to describe, but when someone indicates that they appreciate what you just said or what you just did, that is a pretty special feeling.  I'm going to try to be more conscious of saying it myself. 

Before you donate

Donating money to a charity can be a wonderful thing. Right now there are so many places that can use our help.  Sadly, in times of crisis, there are more folks who try to take advantage of the generosity of others and the scams have already started appearing.  Making random contributions to unknown charities might do little except to empty your bank account if you don't keep your eyes open.  Here is a top ten list of questions you should ask yourself before donating.  Be generous if you are able but be cautious too!

10.  Have I ever given to this organization before?

  9. How does the charity acknowledge my donation?

  8. Is this charity local or does it stretch beyond my town?

  7. Do any of my friends or relatives donate to this cause?

  6. Are the employees/officers of this charity paid inflated salaries?

  5. How much of my money goes directly to those in need?

  4. Do I feel strongly about this cause?

  3. Are my actions/donations really helping?

  2. How can I help, beyond making this donation?

And the number one question you should ask yourself before donating:
  1. Is the charity reputable?

They who served

It was November 11, 1918, the end of “the war to end all wars.” The following year, President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed November 11 as the first commemoration of Armistice Day, saying "To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with solemn pride in the heroism of those who died in the country’s service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy with peace and justice in the councils of the nations." In 1954, it became Veterans Day.

This is not a day about war or about loss of life. Today honors military veterans regardless of whether they served during a time of conflict or peace, and it isn't about those who perished in the line of duty (Memorial Day honors those people). Today is for all persons who served in the United States Armed Forces. It used to feature parades, and speeches, and special tributes to military personnel and usually still does in many communities. In recent years retail stores use it as an excuse for a sale. One positive thing is that more and more businesses do special things for veterans on this day. Numerous restaurants across the country are giving away free meals to veterans today, for example.  

You'll see a lot of mention on social media today about veterans, and certainly it's a very good thing to join in that. I hear "thank you for your service" said often, but it is especially appropriate today.  Say thank you to a vet!

What can you donate?

What can you donate? Well, the list really is endless. Sometimes when we think of giving, we divide into categories such as time, talent, and treasure. The treasure grouping is the one that gets the most attention. Give some money or canned goods (to a food drive) or a car (many charities now look for used cars or even boats). Art work might also be part of this list, and books too.

Donating your talent is a very valuable thing. This is true whether your talent is taking blood pressures or giving tax advice or reading to children.

Donating your time is another wonderful thing. Can you spend a few hours helping out in the office of our non-profit? Can you come in one day and help hand out bags of groceries?

As we say every day here, giving takes many forms. Sometimes we are speaking of the various kinds of donating. What a rewarding thing it is to do!

Stand up for animals

Abusing an animal is one of the most horrible things I can think of. An animal cannot call the police. An animal cannot send an email. An animal cannot contact a doctor when they are injured. Animals are among the most vulnerable, and yet they are taken advantage of at an alarming rate.

Neglect and abandonment are the most common forms of companion animal abuse in the United States. According to the Humane Society of the United States, the shocking number of cruelty cases reported every day in the media is only a small part of the picture. Most cases of animal abuse are never reported, and most animal suffering goes unrecognized and unabated.

This is one of those things that CAN be solved though. This is a people problem. People can stop being cruel. Of course that is the simple answer. The bigger answer is that we all have to care and we all have to get involved and do our part. At the top of the list: do not tolerate any cruelty to animals!

Know who to contact in your area if you witness or suspect animal abuse. (Your police department is always a good place to start). Teach children how to treat animals and to respect them as living creatures too. The earlier the better. Let kids know that it is NOT okay to abuse an animal EVER.

If you have animals of your own, take care of them. If you don't want putties or kittens, be sure to spay or neuter your animals or don't let them spend time with other animals while they are outside.

Support the local shelter or humane society and get to know the work they are involved in. Donate also, if your are able, to your local shelters, pet abuse organizations or the ASPCA.

Animal abuse and neglect can be ended if only we all just care.

Give peace a chance!

One of the things that humans do, that I will never understand, is fight.  The whole idea of war just doesn't make sense to me.  The fighting and killing in Ukraine is horrible, and yet it continues.  For as long as I can remember, I have been hearing people cry out for peace, yet it never seems to stay for very long.  There are always wars somewhere in the world (or the threat of war, which is also bad) and so there is always suffering and dying.  It does not have to be that way though, and thinking about war (and peace) this morning, reminded me of a poem I first heard many years ago (early 70s, I think).  It's called The Box, and I'd like to share it here with you:   

The Box
by Kendrew Lascelles

Once upon a time, in the land of Hush-a-Bye,
Around about the wondrous days of yore,
They came across a sort of box, all bound with chains and locked with locks,
And labelled, "Kindly Do Not Touch... It's War."
A decree was issued 'round about, all with a flourish and a shout,
And a gaily-colored mascot tripping lightly on before:
"Don't fiddle with this deadly box, or break the chains, or pick the locks,
And please, don't ever mess about with War".
Well, the children understood; children happen to be good,
And were just as good around that time of yore.
They didn't try to break the locks, or break into that deadly box,
And never tried to play about with War.
Mommies didn't either; sisters, aunts, nor grannies neither;
'Cause they were quiet and sweet and pretty
In those wondrous days of yore.
Well, very much the same as now, they’re not to the ones to blame somehow,
For opening up that deadly box of War.
But someone did...
Someone battered in the lid, and spilled the insides all across the floor:
A sort of bouncy, bumpy ball, made up of flags and guns and all.
The tears and the horror and the death that goes with War.
It bounced right out, and went bashing all about.
Bumping into everything in store;
And what was sad and most unfair, was that it really didn't seem to care
Much who it bumped, or why, or what, or for.
It bumped the children mainly, and I'll tell you this quite plainly,
It bumps them everyday, and more and more;
And leaves them dead and burned and crying,
Thousands of them sick and dying,
'Cause when it bumps, it's very, very sore.'
There is a way to stop the ball... it isn't very hard at all;
All it takes is wisdom, and I'm absolutely sure
We could get it back inside the box, and bind the chains and lock the locks,
But no one seems to want to save the children anymore.
Well, that's the way it all appears,
'Cause it's been bouncing 'round for years and years,
In spite of all the wisdom whizzed since those wondrous days of yore;
And the time they came across the box,
All bound with chains and locked with locks,
And labeled, "Kindly Do Not Touch... It's War".

The Caring Leader

Making a difference - that's what this blog is all about.  Volunteering is about making a difference too.  I enjoy the time I spend volunteering, but since this blog is NOT about me, let me tell you one of the reasons I enjoy volunteering:  our Volunteer Services Manager.  First let me remind you that I never write about private parties without their knowledge and consent, unless they are public figures or have already been publicized by the media.  I won't therefore be referring to this woman by name.

Other than family, I don't think I have ever met someone as caring and committed as this woman.  It was perfect that she was chosen to recruit, train, and  supervise volunteers. Most people love making someone else’s life a little bit easier. That is one of the reason so many folks volunteer their time.  Quite simply helping others makes us happier.  Our manager though isn't a volunteer, she is a paid staff member.  You might expect her to put in her time and go home.  Nope.  She seems to be involved 24 hours a day. 

 

Of course any good leader should care, but we all know that isn't the case.  Some managers don't lead, they just bark orders.  How many of them really care about you outside of work too?  Sadly, the answer is not many.  My manager though is one of those amazing exceptions.  She is always thinking about her volunteers and seems to always find time for them.  Several years ago, I was a patient in our hospital and she visited me a couple of times, brought me flowers, and even came by to drive me home when I was discharged.  It didn't stop there.  She called later on to see how I was doing!

 

Throughout life I have tried to copy the actions of many of my heroes - folks who to me are making a difference.  I have learned so much from them and am inspired to do better.  My volunteer services manager is such a great example of someone I want to copy.  The world is a better place because of her!

I found something better

Maybe it was because I last night heard Aretha Franklin's signature hit "Respect" or maybe it was a scene I was recalling from the 1966 comedy film The Trouble with Angels, but something suggested I write this today.

 

First the scene from the movie.  An all girls school run by nuns is the scene and the Mother Superior is talking to one of the students about her own youth when she was a seamstress and had dreams of becoming a designer.  The student asks why she gave it up, and after a reflective pause, Reverend Mother says "I found something better."

 

Picture if you will, a high school boy asking a girl out on a date.  He asks just any girl because he wants to be sure of a yes answer, but all the while he is hoping for a yes from a more popular girl, whom he eventually asks.  Having gotten that yes from the girl he really wanted to go out with, he drops the first girl like a hot potato.  He found something (actually someone in this case) that he felt was better.

 

Now these are different situations to be sure, but the point I am trying to make is that we sometimes make changes for the better, but we don't always play fairly.  The girl in the second example certainly didn't get a good deal.  How about when you are choosing teams for basketball and the poor player always gets chosen last? 

 

Recently an organization sent out invitations to a number of people asking for someone to come and speak at an event.  They really didn't want just any of them though.  The first person who said yes was thanked and told when and where the event was and she was expecting to be the speaker - that's what they had told her.  A few days later the organization received a late response from one of the others that they had invited.  The late responder was a bigger name and so they dumped the first in favor of this new person.  Were they playing fair?

 

Think about these situations.  When, if at all, is a good time to go with something better?

Give me a list

Start a list. What can YOU do to make a difference in the world? How can you brighten someone's day? What can just about any one of us do? Give me a list folks and then let's all get doing it!  

Let's begin with an easy one:  Say something nice to everyone you meet today.  We can certainly all do that! Let the person behind you in the grocery store go ahead of you in line.  That's pretty easy too.  See what I mean?  Doing good does not have to be difficult.  Try to be positive and uplifting in everything you do.  

 

So, what else might make your list?  How about calling an estranged family member or giving a bag of groceries to a homeless person or giving coffee to people on their way to work in the morning.

Suggestions?  We don't have to have long lists, but i know if we really try, we can come with a lot of ways to make a positive difference.  Share your thoughts in the comments section below!

The ethic of reciprocity or prime directive

The ethic of reciprocity, more commonly referred to as the Golden Rule, is a wonderful life guide. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” is the way most of us have heard it. Wonderful concept it is and it can be found in many different religions, although belief in any god, does not seem to be part of this principle.

Islam is one place where this concept shows up a lot. Look to The Quran and read “Woe to those who, when they have to receive by measure from men, they demand exact full measure, but when they have to give by measure or weight to men, give less than due” (Surah 83 vv. 1–4) There are numerous other references in The Quran that deal with the Golden Rule, without calling it that.

In Jewish custom we find it too. In the book Leviticus it says “You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against your kinsfolk. Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Taoism gives us the same principle. “Regard your neighbor's gain as your own gain, and your neighbor's loss as your own loss.” (T'ai Shang Kan Ying P'ien)

Christians get it in many forms, but Saint Paul’s letter to the Galatians probably says it best: “For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.” We hear Jesus preaching this principle in the gospels.

It would seem to me that this ethic is so very basic, that it should be our prime directive. (Yes, just like on Star Trek). How wonderful it would be if we all followed this rule!

The answer is YES

Can I change the world? Someone actually questioned me about that. After reading this blog for a while, they sent me an email asking, "do you really think you can change the world?"

The answer of course is YES! I can and you can and all of us can if we get involved and if we do something and if we simply TRY to make a difference. Will sitting alone in a room and moaning about the things we don't like change anything? Probably not.

This blog does not give you all of the answers. I certainly don't have all of the answers. Nobody has all the answers. I never have pretended that to be the case. I don't think I am the authority on change or involvement or making a difference - I am just one voice. I do hope you will join me though. Some 6,000 people have already joined Josh in his efforts to help Thomas proving that together we can do so much more! (If you have no idea what that last sentence meant, you have been reading this recently.  Just click HERE and you can read the whole story and also donate if you wish).

I would love to hear your comments too. Occasionally I get an email, but you can comment right here too so that other readers can easily read your thoughts (and you can even do so anonymously). Changing the world for the better is something all of us should be interested in doing! Join us!

Remembering them

All Souls' Day is a day of prayer and remembrance for the faithful departed. It is also sometimes called The Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed.

Many places seem to have merged the three days of Allhallowtide, which I think is a shame. I have always felt that remembering our dead is such a good thing, regardless of your faith tradition (or lack of one). Of the three days, this is the one most often left out.

Today I will be thinking of my mother and my father, but also other family members who have passed away. I will also be remembering all my friends who have died and the famous people and the unknown. Every single life is precious, and how wonderful it is to remember the souls of all those who have come before us.

Many folks will be in church today, especially it being a Sunday. Many will head to cemeteries afterward. Do you have any personal traditions for All Souls' Day? Feel free to share them here.

I mean to be one too

Let us now praise famous men, and our fathers that begat us. This one verse from Ecclesiasticus, used to be read every year on All Saints' Day, because it gives a good summary of what the day is all about. A passage from the Revelation to Saint John also helps explain the day. "These are they who have come out of the great ordeal; they have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb." 

Of course, a good preacher might be explaining the whole All Saints' Day concept to us, or we can look to a wonderful hymn that does an excellent job telling the story.  Written by a young Englishwoman, Lesbia Scott and first published back in 1929, "I sing a song of the saints of God" clearly sets out what All Saints' Day is all about. 

Today we honor all the saints, known and unknown. In the belief that there is a prayerful spiritual bond between those in heaven and those still living, we honor not only the named saints (such as those pictured in the icon here), but all the faithful. The word "all" is important to me here because I firmly believe that it is not just about the Blessed Virgin Mary, Blessed Paul the Apostle, Blessed Francis of Assisi, and the rest. It is about every single one of us because we all have the ability to do good things and to make a difference. 

Lesbia Scott's words seem to say the same thing. She lists a doctor, a queen, and a shepherdess in her first verse and then continues the list adding a soldier and a priest and one who was slain, in verse number two. It's really the third verse though that give me the greatest hope: 

"They lived not only in ages past,

There are hundreds of thousands still.

The world is bright with the joyous saints

Who love to do Jesus' will.

You can meet them in school, or in lanes, or at sea,

In church, or in trains, or in shops, or at tea;

For the saints of God are just folk like me,

And I mean to be one too."

There's the kicker: "And I mean to be one too." Yes, today is a celebration of the various saints down through the ages, but that is only part of it. "They lived not only in ages past, There are hundreds of thousands still."  Celebration?  Certainly.  Today though is also an invitation.  "And I mean to be one too."

Different kind of Halloween

We all know about the traditional Halloween custom of dressing up and going door to door for candy.  It's called trick or treat because if a treat doesn't come our way (usually some kind of candy) we play a trick like toilet paper in their bushes or a few eggs thrown against their door.  I've told you before about another way to do the day though and it seems much more positive.

 

I've heard it called Backward Halloween, but it is such a good thing, it would hardly be backward.  Reverse Halloween is another way of describing it.  Instead of expecting something for you, give something to someone else.  Make it a day of volunteer service.  Help a neighbor.  Assist some of your friends with various projects.  All kinds of ideas make it a very productive experience.  Remember of course to follow safe practices, including masking (not just the Halloween kind).

 

Oh and the usual candy?  Well, instead of collecting candy, we could distribute candy.  Buy several bags of those small candy bars and go up and down your streets.  Visit some of the shops and restaurants too. Go to the fire stations, hospitals, offices, and libraries, and even to a senior center.  Don't expect people to give something to you, but instead give something to them.

 

You will be surprised at how many smiles you will generate with this different kind of Halloween.  Save something for yourself and salute your own good effort with a well-deserved treat!

The Triduum of Allhallowtide

Just the mention of the triduum of Allhallowtide probably has you scratching your head, but that is what is coming up beginning tomorrow. We first have Halloween, then All Saints' Day, and finally All Souls' Day. This started out as a Christian observance. These days, while there is certainly still a Christian celebration of All Saints, the rest has become very commercialized and secularized.

Remembering the dead, especially our own family members, is a wonderful part of the three day observance. This particularly gets attention on the last of the three days. Many Catholic and Anglican churches will have special masses on All Souls' Day to pray for the departed.

Halloween gets the most attention of course. In some places, it is practically an actual holiday! People dress up in costumes and attend parties, and it isn't just for the kids anymore! Oh and don't be surprised to find traditional foods like potato pancakes, caramel apples, colcannon (a traditional Irish dish made of mashed potatoes and kale), cider, popcorn balls, and soul cakes. There are numerous Halloween customs and trick-or-treating (going door to door in costume and asking for candy "treats") is probably the best known.  I'll tell you about another idea here tomorrow.

I could easily go on and on about the many associated traditions for these upcoming three days, but why not look into it a bit yourself? Oh, and whatever you do, be safe and have a positive experience.

Everyone smiles in the same language

I am convinced that there is just not enough happiness in the world. Why? No matter how bad anything is, there is always reason to go on. Things can always get better.

I know. Someone is going to say, "What if the doctor says you have only a few days to live"? Well, doctors can be wrong. I have heard many stories confirming that very fact. I even know a woman who was told just after her 60th birthday, that it would be her last. In fact, she was told she had only a few months to live. That woman is now 93!

We so often have trouble trusting these days. We have difficulty communicating too. Does he speak the same language as I do? Will we understand the meaning of our intentions? All of these things are valid of course, but one thing we seem to overlook. Happiness is easy to spot and easy to understand. Happiness is very easy to spread too. Happy people are more likely to make others happy.

Whatever part of the world you come from - whatever your race, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender identity, age, or eye color, one thing is universal. We all smile in the same language!

The purpose of life

What is the purpose of life? Have you ever heard that question asked?  Why are we here?  How should we act?  Should we be ruthless and dishonest and claw our way past others to get the biggest piece of the pie?  What are we expected to do during our lifetime?

You probably already know my answer to the above questions.   I think we are all here to each make a difference for the better. We all should contribute to the common good, but that's just my opinion. 

It would seem that the great essayist, lecturer, and poet Ralph Waldo Emerson agreed. It was he who said “The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”

What do YOU think is the purpose of life?

have I got some questions for you!

How are we doing with this blog? When do you read it? Who do you think we should mention here? What kinds of things have we left out? Where might we find more hometown heroes? Why is this even important? When will more folks get involved? How can folks interact here?  Oh, and what about the past two days here?

I prefer writing encouraging things.  It's so nice to tell the positive stories of people making a difference.  Occasionally though I see some bad things that simply must be addressed.  Any thoughts about what I wrote here yesterday and the day before?

Okay, so there are a lot of questions I can ask about this blog. You may have questions of your own. Right under each day's entry is a space that says comments. Write something there. Ask a question or make a comment. I have a never-ending supply of questions, but I certainly don't have all the answers. Perhaps you can help.

There are tons of ways we can give back of course. I humbly offer some suggestions that come to mind or tell you about some folks who have done a stellar job of being a superstar, but I need your help. I would love to know about some of the really positive people you may have encountered. Who is a hero to you? Tell us the what, when, where, and why too!  

Those are my questions for you today.  Remember you can use that comment section to ask questions of me.  

It's not just about the wallet

Donations make a difference - I've said so for years, but there is more than just money.  Some folks want to contribute but simply can't afford to give money.  Of course, there are clothing drives and toy drives and food bank collections.  These are all ways to give without necessarily dipping into your wallet.  There is also the giving of your time and your talent - a very valuable gift.

 

But wait!  There is more than just the tangible.  The sense of belonging to a cause of joining it and becoming a part of it, is very important.  I personally do fundraising walk-a-thons regularly and one of the big things for me is the getting together with other committed folks.  Sharing information and visibility are important for most any cause.

When you get those emails or phone calls asking you to give, it doesn't have to be about your wallet.  If it is something you are passionate about, there are other ways to make a difference.  These days there are a lot of folks rallying around political causes too.  Whatever rings a bell for you, don't despair that you are unable to give money.  Instead, think of other ways you can do good and get involved.  There is always a way to give back!

Lots of folks will be asking for money on these last months of the year.  Something for us all to think about.

The Twenty

I have told this story before about how special we all are, but I really like it and some of you might not have read my blog the day I told this before, so here it is again.  A well-known speaker started off his seminar holding up a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this."

 

He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill. He then asked, "Who still wants it?" Still the hands were up in the air. "Well," he replied, "What if I do this?" And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. "Now, who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air.

"My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We may feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you. The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE. You are special - Don't EVER forget it."

As I mentioned above, I am retelling this wonderful story, and the first time I posted it, it was a retelling too. I have no idea who first told it - it's been circulating on the internet for some time.  The significant thing is the messages it brings.  We are all special.  We should all count our blessings, and NOT our problems!

Be the spark

I love it when folks post encouraging things on social media. Encouraging others, I think actually encourages ourselves. Sometimes I read a long and very profound message, and other times it is short and to the point. ("Be Kind"). There always seem to be more encouraging messages around the holidays and especially as the new year begins.  How about now though?  I think we can all use some encouragement in the summer too.

This morning as I looked at my X feed, this jumped out at me: "All it takes is a single spark to build a fire. Commit to being that spark in your community and make a difference." Wow! I couldn't have said it any better.  That's the kind of encouragement I'm talking about.

 

Be the spark.  Isn't that what we talk about here every day - being the spark? More and more I see folks agreeing, and I think this world is getting better each day!  Let's all keep encouraging each other.  Let's all keep making a difference!

Just because

"Why are you doing this?" I heard him ask. "Just because," was her simple reply. "Just because."

You can say you are giving back because you want to change the world or because you want to make a difference. You can say you want to see a smile on the face of others or that you enjoy doing things for people. You can say that random acts of kindness help make things better for all of us and you are simply passing them on. Of course, you don't have to give any reason at all! Just pay it forward .   .   . just because.

Oh, those wonderful kind deeds we do for other people. They sure do brighten up the day!

How many of those just because things can you think of? How about taking an acquaintance to dinner, sponsoring someone in a fundraising walk-a-thon, donating time at a senior center, saying something nice to everyone you meet during your day, or donating blood? What other random acts of kindness can you think of? Add your suggestions in the comments section below.

In times of personal crisis

One of the most rewarding things I do is volunteer at a local hospital.  I know this blog is NOT about me, but I simply must share how good the volunteer experience is.  I see men and women from their teen years up into their senior years (there was actually a women in her mid 90s volunteering until recently) doing all sorts of tasks around the hospital.

 

Occasionally I have encountered visitors or patients crying in the hospital hallways.  The other day I saw a familiar face, a lady I have run into several times.  The very first time I saw her she asked for a hug.  Now she tells people I'm a good hugger.  This time she had tears.  Her husband is nearing the end of his life.  I listened.  I wish I could have done more.  Sometimes just quietly listening is helpful.  I saw her again a few hours later.  She was smiling,  Her husband was going home that day and the doctor had referred them to a hospice program.  I listened to her news and then we hugged again.

 

There are happy moments, like when someone is healed from injury or when a new baby is born, but all too often I meet people in times of personal crisis.  I try to help as best I can, but there are times when I don't think I have done enough.  We have a small gift shop that is staffed by volunteers.  Information is given to visitors at the front desk and at other locations by volunteers.  The other day a doctor stopped me in a hall just to say thanks.  He told me he is grateful for volunteers and all the things we do.  It's true that we do many tasks all around the hospital, but I really like being in the hallways, whether transporting a patient to be discharged, hearing a compliment from a physician, or giving a hug to a worried wife.

 

Hospitals can be difficult places, but I will keep volunteering.  I think volunteers make a difference.  It's not just what we give.  We also get such a good feeling back!