Brighten Up My Day

Writing these words here every morning, brightens up my day. Hopefully along the way you also find something that helps to brighten yours. I hear people say they don't have the resources to make a difference - not enough money. not the right skills, not enough time in their busy lives. Seriously? There is ALWAYS a way!

Some things that don't require money include volunteering to read to kids in your local library, donating some time at a senior center, sharing flowers from your garden, giving blood at your community blood bank, or paying a visit to a homebound person. They don't necessarily require much time either, if you know how to manage your schedule. A very simple thing to brighten the day is to make a point of smiling more often and greeting people you encounter, rather than ignoring them. No special training is required for any of these things to!

Yes, donating money or property is a wonderful thing to do, but not everyone can afford it. There are so many other ways to brighten someone's day. Compliment the teller in the bank. Let the store manager know when you receive exceptional service. (People are quick to complain when things go bad, but way to slow in offering the praise that is so often do).

Oh, and another thing everyone reading this can do - share this with others and add your own ideas in the comments section below!

Baby it's hot outside

On the news once again, a small child has been left in a hot car while the mother went off to do something else. In this case she was on a job interview - she needed that job to provide for herself and her child, but she put the child at risk. Sadly, this was not an isolated incident.

Cars can get hot - very hot. In summer weather, the temperature inside a car can quickly rise to 120 to 140 degrees Fahrenheit. Heat stroke begins at 104 degrees. Cracking the windows or turning on the air conditioning doesn't make it better. It still might get too hot to be safe. There is also the risk that I child might play around with the car and accidently put it in neutral. Oh course there is also the risk of abduction.

Heat in your car should be a concern if you have pets too. Don't leave a dog or cat any more than you would a child. It might actually be worse for them. Oh and on a really hot day, think twice about taking your pets out on the hot sidewalks, as the really hot cement might be hard on their feet.

 

Heat can injure and heat can kill.  Protect yourself, your children, and your pets!

Start each day with YES!

Sometimes with all the negativity in the world, it can be difficult for us to stay positive, but I have found it helps to have a very simple resolve: start each day with YES!  Our minds are powerful tools though and sometimes just thinking something gives us a very good boost.  Having a yes kind of attitude can go a long way!

 

Now I won't make believe that there are not any problems in the world.  Certainly there are many.  Can we solve every single one of them?  Probably not today.  We can make a start though.  We can do some good.  Of course changing the world means believing in yourself and your ability and trusting and believing in other people as well.  It's a tall order I know.

 

Think about the opposite though for a moment.  You wake up in the morning and ask if it's going to be a good day.  NO!  Am I going to eat a nice, delicious breakfast?  NO!  Will the commute to work be an easy one?  NO!  If you begin each day with negativity, there is no chance there for a smile - no chance for a happy day.  Even when something bad happens, no matter how minor or how big, shrug it off believing that better things are coming.

 

Yes, I'm going to have a good Sunday and a good week ahead!  Yes, you are too!

The Balloons

I find this very easy to write this Tuesday morning because I'm going to share someone else's story.  I have no idea who wrote this.  It's one of those things you find on the internet from time to time.  I have a personal reason for wanting to share it though, so I hope you will read on.  And no, it's not because today is my birthday, although it is.

One day a professor gave a balloon to each of her students, who had to inflate it, write their name on it, and throw it in the hallway. The professor then mixed all the balloons and gave the students five minutes to find their own balloon. There was a hectic search, but nobody found their own balloon. 

It was then that the professor told the students to take any balloon and give it to the person whose name was written on it. In just minutes, everyone had found their own balloon. 

The professor then told them "These balloons are like happiness. We will never find it if everyone is only looking for their own. When we care about other people's happiness, we'll find ours too."

This is a story about sharing and about working together and about caring.  As I said, I didn't come up with the idea, but for me today it had a personal significance.  I hope it has some meaning to you as well.

confused?

Today is Memorial Day.  Is it the official start of summer? Is this a boating and picnic celebration? Is today's holiday meant as a time to rest from work? Actually, folks will hang all of those tags on Memorial Day, and an extra day off as summer approaches (it doesn't actually begin until next month) with a little time out on the water, or holding a cookout, can certainly be fun. Please don't think for a second that I dislike any of those things, but today has a larger purpose, and all too often that is overlooked. Even folks who know of a connection to military personnel, will often get it wrong.

The purpose of Memorial Day is to remember and be thankful for all the men and women who died fighting for our country, or from wounds sustained while fighting.  While cemetery ceremonies do indeed happen on Veterans Day (and even to some extent on Independence Day), remembering those who died while fighting is the specific focus of today.  Today was NOT set aside to honor and thank all those people who served honorably in our military (that's Veterans Day). 

But yes, we can have a barbecue or play some softball or even head out to the sales on lawn furniture.  None of those are bad.  Just pause at some point and remember the brave men and women who really made a difference in this world!

Our pathways

It's often difficult to put ourselves in someone else's shoes to appreciate their journey in life, if we haven't experienced the same things as they have. It is very kind though to find compassion for their situation and lend a listening ear when needed.

There is an old saying "Don't expect everyone to understand your journey, especially if they've never has to walk your path."  How very true.  My goals may possible be the same goals that you have, but we just might have different ways of getting there.  Now, I don't mean to suggest that my way is the best way or the only way, the word I would is "different."  Out pathways may be different from each other.

 

We don't all travel on the same road.  Our pathways are different.  Some of us go in different directions but still end up in the same place.  Some of us go around in circles or walk paths that seem to lead nowhere.  When we encounter each other along the way though, we should stop and meet and share our common stories.

 

The pathways of life are varied but they are best enjoyed when shared with others.

Yield

You’re driving down the street when suddenly you see a flashing light behind you and you hear a siren. What should you do? Apparently, some folks think to correct answer is step on the gas and try to beat the emergency vehicle, as you proceed on down the street. WRONG!

Let’s take just a moment to remember what it is that emergency vehicles do. An ambulance transports sick or injured people to hospitals and medical centers. More often than not, when an ambulance is involved, the patient is in urgent need of care and every minute counts. Fire trucks sometimes respond to medical calls and various random emergencies, but most of the time they are headed to fires, where once again, every minute counts. Police may be responding to any number of calls – a hostage situation for example, or a murder, robbery, or rape. Again, time is of the essence.

The flashing lights and sirens were developed to signal people that this is a vehicle that needs priority treatment. Please yield. Of course one very good reason for doing so is that it is the law, and a heavy fine can hit you for not yielding. The better reason though is that it is simply the right thing to do. Would you like someone to die because you blocked an ambulance? Would you like someone to lose their house because you didn’t let the fire truck through?

You can make all the difference in the world with just a bit of road courtesy. Yield to the first sound of a siren!

The list just keeps on growing

The list of ways to make a difference is endless.  From time to time I have shared some thoughts here.  Today I have some more!

 

Open the door for another person. Give blood. Bring flowers to work and share them with coworkers. Pay for the meal of the person behind you in the drive-through. As you go about your day, pick up trash. Call or visit a homebound person. Pay a compliment at least once a day. Leave a treat or handmade note of thanks for a delivery person or mail carrier.

 

Leave an extra-large tip for the waitperson (if you can afford to). Tell a bus or taxi driver how much you appreciate their driving. Give the gift of your smile. Draw names at work/school and have people bring a small gift or treat for their secret pal. Sponsor people in fundraising walk-a-thons.

 

The gift of sharing can be awesome too, so please do share your own ideas!  You can do it below in the comments section!

Mail call

Do you ever even see a letter carrier anymore? Remember when you used to wait for your mail each day? With so much instant communications now, fewer and fewer folks actually post cards and letters. Why? Isn't that still a valid form of communication? I say YES!! In fact, I'd love to see a movement to get back to sending letters and cards via the mail. (No card company put me up to this).

When I reach into my mailbox and find a personal letter or a card that someone has thoughtfully selected, it brings a smile to my face, and I want to immediately open it. I wish there were more.

Now, don't get me wrong, I love the internet and spend significant time on twitter, Instagram, and of course facebook. I love getting "newsy" emails too. Those though seem to be even more scarce. Folks will send an instant message of a text, but usually it's just a few words, and often even they are abbreviated.

We just aren't communicating with each other like we once did. Does anyone agree? Can I convince some of you to head down to your local drugstore or card shop and pick up a few greetings? How about a nice letter telling your friends and family that you are thinking of them? Of and while I'm at it, I'd love to hear from YOU too! One really easy way is simply to add your thoughts to the comments below. Let's communicate once again!

From a New York taxi driver

I have no idea who wrote this - I found it a long time ago on the internet and have seen it posted several times.  I've even shared it here before.  It's the kind of "feel good" story that I really like and again, these are not my words, but I wanted to share this great story with all of you once again.

A NYC Taxi driver wrote:

I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I honked again. Since this was going to be my last ride of my shift I thought about just driving away, but instead I put the car in park and walked up to the door and knocked..

'Just a minute', answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.

After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90's stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940's movie.

By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets.

There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

'Would you carry my bag out to the car?' she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.

She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.

She kept thanking me for my kindness. 'It's nothing', I told her. 'I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.'

'Oh, you're such a good boy, she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, 'Could you drive through downtown?'

'It's not the shortest way,' I answered quickly.

'Oh, I don't mind,' she said. 'I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice.

I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. 'I don't have any family left,' she continued in a soft voice. 'The doctor says I don't have very long.' I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.

'What route would you like me to take?' I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.

We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, 'I'm tired. Let's go now'.

We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico.

Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move.

They must have been expecting her.

I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

'How much do I owe you?' She asked, reaching into her purse.

'Nothing,' I said.

'You have to make a living,' she answered.

'There are other passengers,' I responded.

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

'You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,' she said. 'Thank you.'

I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life.

I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day,I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver,or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more important in my life.

We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

Rule to live by

Some people say they have a code of ethics or a rule to live by. The whole "giving back" idea that I write about here every day, I think is a form of this code.  Many refer to it as the Golden Rule.

 

It really is quite basic: we should treat others as we would like others to treat us. Not hard to understand, right? It is generally stated as "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

 

There is a "two-way" relationship between us and the others in our world and that relationship involves both sides equally. None of us likes to have too many regulations, but we all should have some kind of positive rule to live by. This is just basic human values.

 

I can remember when people used to quote this rule.  I can remember when it was common for people to actually live by it too. We can go back to that again. It is possible.

Flowerful days

Who can look at a colorful bunch of flowers and not be happy?  There is something very cheery about the image whether it is in a cut floral arrangement or a garden in back of our house or a pretty planting by the side of the street we are walking on.  Flowers are happy images.

 

I'll bet you cannot tell me every place where there is a flower between your home and your workplace.  Can you think where the closest garden is to where you are right now?  How about a florist - do you know where there is one?  Even our parks are places where there are beautiful flowers and plants for us to enjoy.

 

If you are at a reception or at a church service or at a funeral or a wedding, do you notice the flowers that might be around you?  People place them there for a reason.  Flowers brighten up our lives!  Take notice of them and be happy.

What do YOU think?

My thoughts and the ideas I put forth each day in this space, are not the only concepts out there. Yes, I make suggestions on how we might all help make this a better world, but are my ideas any good? Are there better ways? Your sentiments are worth hearing too, even if we might not agree with them.

I have said this before, and will likely say it many more times, but even though this blog is NOT about me, it is written by me, and therefore is heavy laden with my opinion. What about yours though? You much have thoughts on the subjects I post here. Do you agree with me or disagree? Let's hear YOUR opinion too!

Right under the last line I write each day it says "blogged by Michael Fullam at time." Right next to that you will see a place where you can comment. I'd really love to hear your opinion. I'm sure many people would like to look at the thoughts of others as well.

So, after all these years, you pretty much know what I think about a LOT of things. You have read countless suggestions from me and I've told you about good deeds and folks I consider inspirations to me. Now, take a moment or two and tell me what YOU think!

Before you kick it

I've always felt that having goals is a good thing. Lately I hear more and more people talk about their bucket lists. Are they really such a good idea though? Some people say we are rushing death (the term "bucket list" coming from kicking the bucket, a popular expression meaning to die) and others say we are creating lists with difficult to fill ideas. I'm thinking though that having defined goals, can't be a bad thing.

Some folks list very simple things, and some come right out of a thrill-seekers guide. What about you though - are there places you would really like to visit or people you want to meet of see perform or maybe some special things you want to do?  How about this:  don't just make a list but include other folks.  There are organizations that help fulfill the wishes of dying people, but how about if we all did something really special before someone else passed away - a shared bucket list if you will.  I think I could really get behind that idea!

So how many of you think that is a good idea? How many of you have a bucket list of any kind? Before you kick the bucket, is there something special you want to do for others?

anyway

Saint Teresa of Calcutta (known then as Mother Teresa), who founded the Missionaries of Charity, a Roman Catholic religious order (which consists of over 4,500 sisters and is active in 133 countries), once said "By blood, I am Albanian. By citizenship, an Indian. By faith, I am a Catholic nun. As to my calling, I belong to the world. As to my heart, I belong entirely to the Heart of Jesus." It is no wonder that I admire her so!

Saint Teresa did and said many wonderful things during her lifetime. One of my favorite quotes I refer to as her "anyway" message:

“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway. If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”

Happiness is a warm puppy

The wonderful Peanuts cartoonist Charles Shultz said “Happiness is a warm puppy.”  That gives you an immediate image.  You can picture it immediately.  What else is happiness though?  What makes you happy?  What do you do to bring happiness to others?

Obviously, there is not just one answer to my question.  It's going to be a little bit different for each individual.  I really think that being happy is a choice.  We each have the power to bring happiness into our lives and into the lives of others. WE can make it happen!  In fact, Ralph Waldo Emerson makes the same point when he said, “For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.”

Being angry or being unhappy can and does happen, even when we are trying to be upbeat and cheerful, but my point is that we can change things.  We can turn a bad day into a good one, just by changing our attitude.

So be happy, and while you're at it, spread some of that happiness around!

How would you like a cow?

How would you like a cow? That's probably not a question you have ever been asked, but I'll tell you why I brought it up. There is an organization called Heifer International, with a mission to work with communities to end poverty hunger and to care for the Earth. It's a great group and many look to them for unusual presents at Father's Day, birthdays, or at the end of the year when they do holiday gift-giving.

I'm sure you are familiar with the proverb that says "give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." That's how Heifer International works. Instead of giving a glass or a jug of milk, you give a whole cow! The first female calf born of that cow is given to another family, thus extending the original gift even more. Pretty wonderful huh?

There are more than just cows given and they do have opportunities in a variety of price ranges. You can give a goat or a sheep or a pig for just $120. Rabbits are each $60 and a flock of chicks is only $20. A heifer? Well of course they are available. $500 is the cost, but you can share the cost with others and pay as little as $50.

This is one organization I'm sure you will want to know more about. Go to http://www.heifer.org/ to learn more online. They have tons of information on your website about how you can get involved and make a difference.

more ways to brighten the day

Remember those lists we have begun here before?  Well let's see what else we can add to make a difference in the lives of others. In no particular order, here are a number of additional ideas. 

 

Give another driver your parking spot.  Give your full attention to someone in need and simply listen.  Stop by a nursing home, and visit someone who has no family nearby.  Have a clean-up party in the park.  Bring coworkers a special treat.  Buy cold drinks for the people next to you at a ball game.  Spend some time serving food at a meal program for the needy.  Volunteer to be a tutor in a school.  Remember the bereaved with phone calls, cards, plants, and food.

 

Volunteer to read to kids in the library.  Donate time at a senior center.  Give a pair of tickets to a concert or baseball game to a stranger.  Send a gift anonymously to a friend.  Transport someone who can’t drive.  Make telephone calls in support of equality urging others to put aside hate.  Send a treat to a school or day-care center.  Volunteer at an organization that needs help.  Go through your closets and find several nice items and then donate them to a shelter.  Buy books for a day care or school.  Give toys to the children at a shelter.  Volunteer to fix up an elderly couple’s home.

Invite someone new for dinner, either in your home or in a restaurant. Say nice things randomly to facebook and twitter friends.  Buy some bottles of water and randomly hand them out to strangers on the street.  Drop off a plant or a plate of cookies to your nearby police or fire station.  Clean graffiti from neighborhood walls and buildings.  Buy a stranger a free pizza.  Mow a neighbor’s grass or sweep a neighbor’s walk.  Offer to return a shopping cart to the store for someone loading a car.

Pay for the person behind you in the movie line.  Tell your parents/children why you love them.  Make a point of finding the name of a supermarket or drugstore employee and then praise him/her through that company’s corporate office.  When drivers try to merge into your lane, let them in with a wave and a smile.  Tell your boss that you think he/she does a good job.  Give blood.  Treat someone to fresh fruit.  Sing at a nursing home. 

 

Let's let this list keep on growing!

 

Encouragement from Lincoln

Our nation's 16th president, Abraham Lincoln said "America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves." Think about that for a moment as you look at what is going on around the country.

Now remember that during Lincoln's administration we had a civil war. He did not call for that war though. The war was caused by hate.

Mr Lincoln is a pretty good voice to listen to right now will all of our many concerns. He told us "We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution." 

One more thing. I find this very encouraging all these many year later. Lincoln said "I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts." 

The Presidential election is six months away, but the discussions are happening right now.  Let's listen to history.  Let's show love and respect and justice for everyone.  Let's not let Abraham Lincoln down.  

what goes on here

If you just stumbled across It's NOT about me for the first time, let me take a moment to explain.  This blog is about making a difference in the world and it contains stories of hometown heroes who give back and do good things and also has suggestions and ideas for how we ALL can make a difference.  This is a positive energy place and I continue to be excited day after day and year after year. 

 

To say that it is NOT about me might be a little misleading - possibly suggesting that I don't need to one of those giving back.  The title came about to make it clear that I wouldn't be telling stories about my vacation or sharing recipes or bringing you news about how may day went at work.  In that sense, this blog is not about me.  Because we all should be part of the goodness of our world, it of course IS about me, and in fact is about ALL of us!  (Perhaps I should have called it It's not ONLY about me).

 

Anyway, I hope you will read what I write here regularly and I hope you will join in the conversation.  There was a time when many folks were leaving comments here, but that seems to have stopped.  Please feel free to add your own thoughts and suggestions.

 

What can we ALL do to make this a better world?

grateful

Are you grateful for anything?  Is your life pretty fantastic and you are so very thankful for that?  Lately I have seen that question pop up a lot on social media and usually there's a "list three things you are grateful for every day for the next week and nominate three of your friends each day to do the same."

 

Well, getting 21 people to join you in making lists of things you are grateful for might be a pretty huge challenge.  I'm not going to shoot quite so high.  

How about a somewhat smaller exercise?  Spend a few minutes each day thinking about things you are grateful for.  You don't have to write a list or tell your friends - just think about it.  If you like, you can do more.  You can send out some thank yous for example.  Let people you are grateful for, know about it.

 

One thing that always is nice is when you share any of your thoughts with us here too.  Write below in the comments section some of the things you are grateful for.  If you like.  No pressure.  You won't even have to involve 21 of your friends!

do the right thing

Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was a great man, usually referred to with the honorific Mahatma, meaning venerable, and most often thought of as a leader of non-violence.  He is often quoted and had some wonderful things to say about doing the right thing.

It is easy to do the "expected thing."  Many folks do the "thing that will bring them the most recognition."  The "right thing though is often the toughest - frequently it is not the popular thing to do.

“It's the action, not the fruit of the action, that's important," according to Gandhi. "You have to do the right thing. It may not be in your power, may not be in your time, that there'll be any fruit. But that doesn't mean you stop doing the right thing."

 

Gandhi was so very wise.  He went on to say "You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no result.”

Do you need a compass?

What do I do? Where shall I go? What comes next? Does my life have any sort of purpose of direction? Well, if you are asking yourself these questions, it's a good thing. Every once in a while it is important for each of us to take stock of ourselves and look not only at where we have been, but where we are going. Sometimes change is a good idea. Do you need some help? Do you need a compass? There is nothing wrong with reaching out to others to try to decide your path.

 

Family and friends can be a great resource in helping to determine with way to go.  When a loss within your family has gotten you asking these questions, it might be even more important to lean on each other, so to speak.  They are not the only resource though.  Some of us have tons of friends and great big families.  Others are a bit more alone.  There are professionals who also can be of great benefits.  Counselors, clergy, health care workers, attorneys, teachers, and others might help guide you when you find yourself questioning what comes next.  Getting involved in support groups can sometimes be of benefit too.

 

The library used to be a great place for finding information.  It still is, of course, but now we also have the internet where we can find answers to our questions in seconds.  Sometimes these answers are all we need as our compass.

 

Nobody should ever have to go through life feeling lost or confused.  Life is more than just being alive, and we all have a purpose.  Find yours.  Life will be so much richer once you know the path you are taking!

Paying it forward

In his 1841 essay Compensation, Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote: "In the order of nature we cannot render benefits to those from whom we receive them, or only seldom. But the benefit we receive must be rendered again, line for line, deed for deed, cent for cent, to somebody."  In other words, instead of paying back the person who did this good for you, pay it forward to someone else.
 

The idea isn't a new one but it can certainly be extraordinary.  In his movie, Haley Joel Osment, tries to make a huge difference in the lives of others after his teacher assigns the class to think of something to change the world and put it into action. Osment's character begins a movement that is responsible for some pretty incredible actions.  (This film by the way is twenty years old so some you may not have seen it.  Take a look.  It's very uplifting).
 

I'm not just talking here about random acts of kindness, although sometimes they are the same.  There may be another movement these days because I have certainly been hearing a number of heartwarming stories. Even in the midst of this pandemic I am hearing stories of generous gift-giving and of restaurant servers receiving unusually high gratuities. 

 

Of course we may not all have the funds to be this generous, but we can still help.  Maybe a group of people will get together for a cause.  Several people working together will lower the cost.  The cost does not have to be high either.  Next time you are in a restaurant and you see a waiter heading to someone's table with their check, intercept that server and pay the check yourself.  Paying it forward will really make you feel wonderful.

Smell the flowers along the way

What do you see? A brown eyed susan? A beautiful blue sky? A brightly colored roof? There is beauty everywhere just as there is good all around us. We only need to look and listen and smell and hear and feel.  There are difficult days and there is ugliness, but we shouldn't let ourselves get caught up in that.

 

To really make a difference in this world we need to have open minds and open hearts and open eyes.  We need to enjoy life.  We need to smell those flowers!  Really.  I used to say that every day and I still mean it.  Smell the flowers along the way.  Really.  It's important. No, we don't have to actually bend down and put our nose to a flower, but we do need to live! 

 

We have so much to give, and it all starts with love.  Smell the flowers along the way.  They're only here for a very short time and they need a lot of love to grow!

Celebrating nurses

In 1953, Dorothy Sutherland of the US Department of Health, Education, and Welfare proposed Nurses Day to President Eisenhower.  That was the first attempt to nationally recognize nurses.  Eisenhower did nothing.  President Richard Nixon finally did something in 1974 when he declared a week in February as National Nurse Week.  In 1990, the American Nurses Association began the current National Nurses Week celebrated from May 6th to May 12th.  Those dates were chosen because Florence Nightingale's birthday was May12.  

 

Now you know why I am writing about nurses today.  You actually only know one reason.  I have always had a great respect for those in nursing and really should write about them more often.  My mother was a nurse.  She was in the very first class of a school in Oneonta, NY and I can still recall her pride at her capping ceremony and all the hard work and dedication that she showed over the years at the many places she worked.

 

When Mom lay dying in a hospital back in 2013, I was again reminded of what angels nurses are.  While there were many wonderful professionals, there was one man in particular whom I will never forget.  He introduced himself to Mom the night she was admitted and then asked her what she wanted to be called.  That really touched her.  Someone cared enough to ask instead of just using her first name or calling her Mrs. - this guy asked.  It wasn't the only time he made an impression.  Just a few days later when her breathing had become difficult and she was in obvious distress, he was working in a different ward, but on my way to get her nurse for that day, I ran into him in the hall.  I was visibly upset and when I told him what was wrong, he turned and came immediately to her room telling me not to worry.  He stayed there with her for the next hour on what I later learned was his own time (he had gotten off just before I ran into him).

 

There are wonderful nurses who make a difference every day.  They take pride in their work and they care about their patients.  Let them know they are appreciated!

The great teacher inspires

William Arthur Ward who wrote more than a hundred articles, poems, books, and meditations, had this to say about teachers: “The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.” Mr. Ward sure got that right! 

 

I'm always talking about people who inspire me and there are certainly teachers on that list.  The men and women in our classroom are too often taken for granted, but they can make a huge difference in the lives of many.  My aunt was a teacher and I've also dated a few teachers and I've seen firsthand the care and concern they have for what they do and for their students.  Yes, there are bad teachers and ones that just go through the motions, but isn't that true with any job?  It's time we showed more appreciation for our schoolteachers and gave them more support.

 

Tomorrow is Teacher Appreciation Day, and the whole week is dedicated to celebrating our country’s educators.  Think about the teachers that touched your life.  Are they still somewhere where you can contact them?  Send them a note of thanks!  I wish I could do that with Lou Ella Gridley, my fifth grade teacher.  She was like no other and I'll tell you more sometime.  I was fortunate enough to have a superior teacher the very next year and I certainly will never forget Letha Sines, my sixth grade teacher.

 

If you have school age children, pay close attention to the men and women who spend so much time each day giving them instruction.  Take notice of all the good they do.  Think of your friends and relatives also who might be teachers. 

 

Teachers make a difference.  I'm so grateful for Miss Gridley, Miss Sines, my dear Aunt Dee, Robert, Emilio, and so many teachers for have influenced my life.  Thanks!

Happy Birthday Keith Haring

Back in 2014, when the Rainbow Honor Walk was dedicated in San Francisco, I had the great privilege of joining with a friend to unveil the plaque in honor of Keith Allen Haring, an incredible artist whom I have always admired.

Keith Haring's life was way too short. Today he would have turned 66. Hard to believe. Keith passed away from AIDS-related complications in 1990, but his legacy lives on not only through his art but through the work of the Keith Haring Foundation, which makes grants that support a wide array of not-for-profit organizations. He lived for only 31 years, but his art and social activism will live forever, because he was not afraid to be seen. He did not live his life in secret, but he boldly let the world see him, and in doing so let the world see his brilliant work. One of his creations became a logo for National Coming Out Day because he was truly a logo in the way he lived, and that should inspire us all to lead an uncloseted life.

The next time I am in the middle of Castro Street in San Francisco (between 18th and 19th Streets) and see Keith Haring looking up at me, I'm going to meditate on his own words: "Art will never leave me and never should. So as I go into the next part of the trip I hope it will be more creative and more work involved and less talk and more doing, seeing, learning, being, loving, feeling, maybe less feeling, and just work my ass off, ’cause that, my friend, is where it’s at!"

Our moms and dads

How many of you have kids? Do you realize how much a parent means to a child? Yes, there are times when both the children and the parents may want to scream, but overall, if it is a good and healthy relationship, there is love and devotion that lasts forever.

It's been eleven years since my mom died and even longer since my father passed away, and I still think of them both and recall with fondness times we spent together. I can remember my mother pushing my sister in her baby buggy with me walking beside her. (I don't remember my own baby buggy days).  I can also recall my dad's last moments in the hospital, and the moment when my mom passed away too.

There are some images that never fade. Sadly some of us have horrible memories and we wish they would go away. The choice is up to every father and mother though as to how they will be remembered. The world would be such a better place if all moms and dads chose to carefully mold their children into good kids who respected others and who would go on to fondly recall those formative years.

On this Sunday morning I'm thinking of Mom and of how much she enjoyed Sundays.  Think about your parents every day.  Remember them especially on their birthdays and on Mother's Day in May and Father's Day in June, and of course during times like Halloween (oh could I tell you stories about the trick-or-treaters coming to Mom's house), Thanksgiving, and Christmas. It is my hope that every parent will be one who is worthy of a celebration and that kids will always be grateful for the love of their parents. Good parenting can have a huge impact!

Don't Bury Your Head

Some people just might claim that the ostrich is the most imitated in all the animal kingdom.  I'm sure you know people who bury their heads in the sand - perhaps not literally, but certainly figuratively.  "Let me close my eyes to all the bad things and pretend they aren't even happening." Of course, that doesn't accomplish a thing!  It does absolutely nothing! Bad things still exist, even when you refuse to look at them.  When you turn on the tv news or pick up your local newspaper, you will see negative stories galore.

Now I don't usually write about what NOT to do, because I have always preferred the more positive side of things.  So instead of suggesting that we not bury our heads in the sand, let me suggest instead that we go through life with our eyes wide open doing the best we can and looking for chances along the way to make change and to do good.  Yes, there is a lot of bad, but instead of moaning and groaning about it, let's think of ideas that will make a difference.  On this Wednesday morning as I look up to the beautiful sky, my thoughts are about the wonderful people who are moving things forward for the better. 

We all have the power to make change.  Sometimes it might not seem like it, but even small things can make a difference.  I was reminded the other day about the power of a simple smile.  It feels good to contribute.  It really does.  Burying your head only makes us feel bad in the end.  I much prefer the good!

just one

Picture this for a moment. You have one chance - one opportunity to change things for the better. Imagine. You can do something so wonderful. Picture this in your mind. Think about it. I'm not talking about lists. I'm not talking about doing something marvelous every single minute or every single day of your life. I'm talking here about one chance to do great. Just one. Think about it for a moment. Study it for a while.

Now imagine one more thing: Imagine everyone doing one great thing.  Everyone.  Every single person in the country - perhaps everyone in the entire world doing one great thing.  Oh my!  Imagine how great things could be if we ALL got on board and made a difference. Just one.  If we all did just one incredible thing.  Think about it. Pretty incredible, huh?  If just one person does their part, it helps.  Now think about all those individuals being joined by others.  So much can be accomplished!

It does not have to start out big at all. It can start with just one person. You can be that one!