Say Their Names

Picture if you will a world where you can't go birding, can't walk home with Skittles, can't go jogging, can't relax in the comfort of your own home, can't play loud music,  can't have a cellphone, and can't sell CDs.  Oh and in this place you also cannot  go to church, walk from the corner store, hold a hair brush while leaving your own bachelor party, can't break down on a public road with car trouble, can't cash a check in peace, can't breathe.  You really don't have to use your imagination because the place exists, and it's right here in this country.

 

So what are we going to do?  Well the answer for far too many people is that we will ignore the racism that causes this and even deny it exists.  When people come along (like Colin Kaepernick) we brand them as trouble makers and stand in the way of their employment.  Oh and when folks get fed up and take to the streets, there are still those who deny there is a problem and instead complain about the protesters. 

 

Let me tell you folks, there is indeed a problem.  Hate in has spread from coast to coast.  During the COVID-19 outbreak there has been an increase in anti-Asian attacks.  The violence against transgender people and gay, lesbian, or bisexual folks also happens all over this country.  Despite the small progress and anti-hate legislation, hate is still a big deal, especially against African Americans.

 

I tried to check this morning for a number of how many Black people have been killed in the US by police officers.  Despite tons of reports, I could not find a final tally.  It seems to grow every day though and so many sit on their hands and do nothing.  We are talking about human beings.  Nobody, not even the most heinous monster deserves to be shot in cold blood.  That's not how civilized people live.

 

Let me admit that I don't have the answers.  I wish it was a quick and easy thing, but hate has been around forever.  I do know that nothing will be solved by denial or by more hatred.  Let's listen to our hearts and do what is right because Black Lives Matter and they ALWAYS have, even though it sure doesn't seem that way a lot of the time.  Let's get involved.  Let's work together.  Let's build a trust.
 

And as we do that, let us not forget all those lives cut short.  Say their names.

 

Randy Evans
Amadou Diallo
Yvonne Smallwood
Sandra Bland
Clifford Glover
John Crawford
Terrence Crutcher
Philando Castile
Keith Scott
Claude Reese
Christian Cooper
Amaud Arbery
Jonathan Ferrell
Renisha McBride
Bothem Sean
Atatiana Jefferson
Stephon Clark
Alton Sterling
Jordan Davis
Mike Brown
Tamir Rice
Trayvon Martin
Oscar Grant
Eric Garner
Freddie Gray
Walter Scott
Clementa C. Pinckney
Cynthia Marie Graham Hurd
Susie Jackson
Ethel Lee Lance
Depayne Middleton-Doctor
Tywanza Sanders
Daniel L. Simmons
Sharonda Coleman-Singleton
Myra Thompson
Corey Jones
Sean Bell
George Floyd

 

 

 

There is a difference

Right in the midst of this pandemic, we have another holiday, Memorial Day, day for remembering the men and women who died while serving in the armed forces. It is not about the barbecues or the sidewalk sales or the trips to the beach or the baseball games that aren't being played, as nice as any of those things are. It isn't even a day for honoring all veterans. (We have a separate holiday for that in November). There seems to always be a bit of confusion, and I have written here about this a number of times. Today is quite specific though. It is for remembering the people who died while serving in the country's armed forces.

Memorial Day was not the original name for the holiday.  It was called Decoration Day when Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote a poem by that name way back in 1882. It was also once called Remembrance Day in some places.

Band concerts and parades a typical ways to celebrate. Religious services praying for those who died in service generally happen on this day as well, and of course visits to cemeteries. So whatever you are doing,  take some time today to also remember all those who served in our military and who didn't make it home alive. It is their memory we honor today.

What is love?

There is a definition in the dictionary for love, but I'm not sure it really it's it on the head. Making a difference in the world, giving back, helping to build a better tomorrow, all that we talk about here in this blog - THAT is what love is all about. It is pretty hard to describe though.

Saint Paul wrote, in his second letter to the Corinthians "If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing."

I mention this because it just might come closer to giving us a good picture, and because this particular passage from Scripture is so often read in churches. The Blessed Apostle has more on the subject though.

He continues "Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love."

It's interesting to me that in earlier translations it says charity, rather than love. When you think of charity - of giving, isn't that something we do out of love? We all need to have faith and we certainly need hope, but that third thing, that wonderful glorious make-the-whole-world-better thing we call love - oh my! Yeah, it's pretty special!

Act to Change

"Together we can put an end to hate."  I wrote those words here yesterday and repeat them again this morning.  In the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, incidents of bullying, racism, and hate against the Asian and Pacific Islander community have been on the rise.  We should be fighting the virus, not each other.

So much misinformation has been out there and even some leaders have been fanning the flames of hatred.  It really doesn't matter who started it though.  We can't even point to just COVID-19 because anti-Asian bullying has been around for a long time.  It is wrong.  Hate is never a good thing. Being teased for how you look, what you wear, or what you eat, is part of it. The stereotypes might give some folks a chuckle, but anything that puts someone down is hurtful.  Lately the physical violence has increased too.

Today is the 2nd annual Asian American and Pacific Islander Day Against Bullying + Hate and as part of it, a special livestreamed event will take place this afternoon from 4-5:30pmEDT. United We Stand will include a number of special guests, including a few heroes of mine whom I have written about here in the past. Rapper and poet Jason Chu will be part of the program as will Philip Wang from Wong Fu Productions. Also scheduled to participate are Lisa Ling, Daniel Dae Kim, Ken Jeong, Lawrence Kao, and Tan France. More information is available at https://acttochange.org/dayagainstbullying/

What else can you do?  Well all month long you can support Act To Change’s giving campaign by making a donation. With your support, they can continue their important work to end bullying in the AAPI community. Click HERE to donate via their GoFundMe campaign.  Also, and this is very important, don't participate in hateful speech and certainly not in violent behavior.  If you have relatives, friends, or coworkers that participate in this hate, stand up and tell them they are wrong and you are not participating in their hatred.  I'll say it again:  "Together we can put an end to hate." 

Be

"There are lesbian, gay, bi, trans or intersex people in every community," says the text that accompanies a video posted last week by the United Nations Free and Equal Campaign.  The text continues "They are your colleagues and acquaintances, friends and family members. Even if you think that you have never met a single member of the LGBTI community, it is more than likely that you have. But some - or maybe all - of them have been forced to stay silent because they will face stigma, discrimination or even violence if they are open about who they are."

The video is a short, happy, upbeat message with the word Be shown throughout.  Be yourself.  Be who you are.  It is encouragement for all those who feel the need to hide.  I totally agree with the message.  Nobody should every have to hide.  During this pandemic it is more important than ever that we reach out and support our fellow humans.  Not all of us are alike, but that's okay.  Today is the International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia.  I wish days like this were unnecessary.  I wish there was no such thing as hate.  Sadly though many people experience this stigma and discrimination their entire life.

Watch the video HERE.  Tell us what you think.  There are a whole lot of BEs in the video, but there is one more we can add:  Be part of the solution.  Together we can put an end to hate.  Let's make it happen.

Sing to our mothers!

I could write here every day about my mother.  She really was special and made a huge difference in my life, in my sister's, and in the lives of so many people she touched.  She worked as a nurse, and during this pandemic, I have thought about her often and about how she would be dealing with all this.  It's been over seven years now since she passed away and I still miss her a lot and think about her often.

Today is Mother's Day of course, but it's a very odd one.  Even if you mom is still alive, you might not be able to see her because of COVID-19.  Even if she is not with you though, she had an impact.  I love how people each year share pictures and stories of their mothers and grandmothers on social media.

Perhaps we can have a zoom meeting or do a facebook live and sing about our moms.  There is an abundance of mother songs by the way.  My favorite though is one called The Perfect Fan, written by Brian Littrell of the Backstreet Boys and performed by them.  Sing these words to your mom as you think happy thoughts about all she has meant to you:

It takes a lot to know what is love

It's not the big things, but the little things

That can mean enough

A lot of prayers to get me through

And there is never a day that passes by

I don't think of you

You were always there for me

Pushing me and guiding me

Always to succeed

You showed me

When I was young just how to grow

You showed me

Everything that I should know

You showed me

Just how to walk without your hands

Cuz mom you always were

The perfect fan

God has been so good

Blessing me with a family

Who did all they could

And I've had many years of grace

And it flatters me when I see a smile on your face

I wanna thank you for what you've done

In hopes I can give back to you

And be the perfect son

You showed me how to love

You showed me how to care

And you showed me that you would always be there

I wanna thank you for that time

And I'm proud to say you're mine

Cuz mom you always were,

Mom you always were

Mom you always were,

You know you always were

Cuz mom you always were... the perfect fan

I love you Mom

Be Yourself

Be yourself.  That might seem like a tall order, or it might seem pretty simple.  At least you have something to think about today.

The great poet, essayist, and lecturer Ralph Waldo Emerson said "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." Indeed.

His words seem to ring even more true these days.  We all can resist though, what others may want us to do.  It shouldn't really be that difficult to  simply be ourselves!